Rebecca wanted to call him a liar, to tell him she owned no such thing, but that would be cruel. She saw that he believed what he was saying in his green eyes. His loyalty and heart were hers for the taking. Which only made her feel more guilt.
She pursed her lips, "when the date with my sister is over, I expect you to let her down easily. You shouldn’t be leading her on if you have feelings for another."
"Like you have for someone else?" He asked coldly.
Before she could answer him he lowered his lips to hers. It started soft, sweet, and tentative; totally different from their first kiss. When she responded, he deepened the kiss. He pulled back and locked his eyes with hers, searching for refusal, but her wolf wouldn’t allow her to pull away. Those questioning eyes pulled her towards him like a lifesaver in the ocean pulling her to safety. She tried to unlock, to remove herself from his warm, inviting embrace but her body refused to listen, the wolf controlled it fully.
"I don't care if I have to wait for you to realize that we belong together. Your body already responds to my touch." He placed a hand on her heart and it raced faster in response. "Your wolf hears mine and accepts me." He growled his appreciation and Rebecca feared her knees would go weak at the wave of passion that flooded her. He crushed his lips to hers again and she responded, opening fully to his bittersweet invasion. When he explored her mouth the wolf growled back, ravenous in her need to possess him. Rebecca’s hands wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss.
He stopped his plundering for just a moment and her lips formed into a pout. "All that’s left is your mind. I’ll consume all of you and in that moment it’ll be glorious." He claimed her waiting lips again. In this moment he owned her. Thoughts of her sister, of Lucky, were lost on the wind. She was lost in the emotion.
Her mind wanted to fight, but chemistry was hard to deny; so was the fact that Lucky was engaged to another woman. Lucky fought against them being together, while Gabriel gave her everything that was his. Never in her life had she expected to fall head over heels so easily, and never with two men at the same time. She was beginning to understand the duality of being a werewolf.
It was Savannah's voice that broke the spell. "How could you?"
The pain in her voice was like being doused with a pail of cold water. Any passion Rebecca felt moments ago was now gone, replaced with the familiar feeling of guilt. All she could do was react. She broke free of his hold and ran after her sister. It wasn't fair; she responded to him, she let him kiss her. She knew it wasn't fair but all she could think about was her sister being upset because she hurt her. Why did she have to tell her it was okay that she go with Gabriel to the dance? All she had to do was say no and feelings would not be hurt now.
Rebecca found Savvy in their room. Tears were on her face and anger reflected in her eyes. Rebecca really hated hurting her sister. "Savvy, I don't know what happened. One minute I was telling him to do something and the next he was kissing me."
"But you were kissing him back." Accusation and truth thick in every word.
"I was." Realization hit Rebecca hard, like a slap to her own face. Dear gods I am in trouble. What was I going to do? How do people live like this? Rebecca wanted to tell her everything, damn the rules and consequences, but the tattoo tingled its warning on her hand.
"Yeah, I know. I saw the whole thing." She sniffed. "I even asked you if it was okay."
"I know. I’m sorry." Rebecca sat on the bed helpless. "Have you ever felt like one part of you wanted one thing and another wanted something else? Like those two parts are at war and you’re simply the casualty in the battle?"
"Sure, we all have, but we use a silly thing called willpower to fight the urges and change direction if it doesn't work." Savvy snapped, hurt stung her eyes.
"That doesn't always work and you know it. You say you want to go for a run with me but instead your desire to sleep in wins all the time. Up to this point the battle has only affected me. I really thought I had my desire for Gabriel under control. I never wanted you to be part of this war." Rebecca sat on her sister’s bed.
"And that’s your mistake. I’m always going to be part of the battle. I’m your sister, your twin. I’ll always be here to help you work through your problems, find solutions, take care of you, just as you are always there for me, or so I thought. It’s a two-way street, sister.” Her eyes shot dagger towards Rebecca. “What’re you going to do about Lucky?"
"Lucky’s my choice, not Gabriel. My mind is set on him. It’s my body that wants Gabriel. I just need to find a way to control the reaction he has on me." Rebecca shook her head thinking it was impossible even as she thought the words. Her alpha hasn’t been very cooperative so far. "I have to tell Lucky what happened."
"Are you sure that’s wise? Remember what happened at school?"
Rebecca hated keeping things from Savvy. There was so much more information she needed to understand. Rebecca hurt her and Savvy was still trying to help her figure out how to fix it. She was an amazing sister. Rebecca nodded, "he has to know." She wiped the tears off Savannah’s cheeks. "How do I make this up to you?"
"It was just a date, sis. No real emotions were involved. I’m just glad I found out now before I ruined my homecoming experience by going with him. I would’ve hated going to homecoming with my future brother in law."
"Not going to happen." Rebecca said firmly.
‘We will see.’ Her alter ego whispered softly.
"I saw that kiss. He’s one hundred percent yours for the taking. And to be honest, there isn’t that much passion between you and Lucky." Savvy smiled softly. "I’ll tell Danny I’ll go with him tomorrow. I’m sure Gabriel will understand why the date is off."
"I am really sorry, Savvy." Rebecca swallowed her guilt. It tasted like coal and burned like fire.
"You better be. I haven't forgiven you just yet." Savvy clicked the lamp off and rolled over, her back to Rebecca.
With that Rebecca’s tumultuous thoughts were met with silence and darkness. "I love you, sister." She whispered. What was she going to do now? It was the last thought she had before she drifted off into another fitful sleep, only this dream was of a green-eyed wolf and a golden-eyed angel.
Chapter Eighteen
~”Loyalty and devotion lead to bravery. Bravery leads to the spirit of self-sacrifice. The spirit of self-sacrifice creates trust in the power of love.”
~Morihei Ueshiba
Savannah
Savannah didn't sleep well during the night and got up hours before her sister did; which was rare, she loved sleeping in. Her dressing routine was easier also since she had a limited choice for wardrobe. She decided on the cheerleading pants instead of the skirt today and chose to wear the tank instead of half sleeve top. Her blonde hair went into a simple ponytail; the wonderful cheat hairstyle that still makes a girl look good with minimal effort. Today, that was all she was feeling. Something was wrong with Rebecca and she had no idea how to fix it.
Savvy sipped her Chai tea as she sat on the front patio contemplating how she was going to be able to help her. Rebecca was a strong person. She tried to take everything on by herself, despite the fact that she had a built in support system with her family. It was idealistic at best. She internalized everything, made it her own personal war. She worked to protect Savvy and Hunter from everything that threatened to take away the perfect childhood she thought they deserved. Unfortunately, she forgot she was only a teenager herself. Granted, they were both only thirty seven days away from turning eighteen, legal adults. But it was still young.
Usually, Savvy recognized the signs before her dearest sister spun out of control, but this time there were no signs. This time she couldn’t stop the train crash from happening and now she needed to help pick up the pieces of Rebecca’s life and help her get back on the right track.
Her attention was drawn to the magnificent sunrise. It had been a long time since she watched the sun battle against the moon for daybreak. It was perhaps the most spellbinding moment of the day. She watched the moon lose ungracefully to the victorious sun in vibrant colors across the sky as she contemplated how she was going to help Rebecca.
The mess was already in place, now she needed to find a way to keep Rebecca from spiraling into the darkness; she’d done it before and that Rebecca was not a pretty picture. Something about this time was different. Rebecca was different; maybe a little stronger but still weak against guilt. When Savvy looked into her eyes, it was like she was seeing a different person. It also didn't help that Rebecca was hiding things from her. No matter how honest she tried to be last night she hid behind half truths. It wasn't just what happened with Gabriel, although that was the incident that made it clear Rebecca was falling apart.
For days, Savvy had been spying on her sister, trying to figure out what Rebecca was hiding. At first, she thought it was Lucky, and then maybe Gabriel. Now she knew it was more. It was everything. And it all started Friday night when their psychic connection was broken.
The disconnection from Rebecca was unsettling. Even at her darkest hour Rebecca never shut her out. It was in those moments that she sought her siblings out. It worried Savvy more than anything else ever had. The lies, half truths, and the way Rebecca had been dancing around them weren’t like her. Rebecca learned long ago that Savvy wouldn’t let her run away. Sometimes she felt like she was smothering her sister, but it was necessary to keep her safe.
“Well, it looks like you’re up early.” Lucky smiled warmly as he approached her on the step. Startled, Savvy glanced up and could have sworn his golden curls and dimpled cheek made him look like an angel. It had to be the light of dawn that gave him a halo.
Instead of going inside to find Rebecca, he sat down beside her and Savvy found her heart fluttered like butterfly wings in flight. Memories of the night she rode on his Harley to pick up Rebecca’s car flushed her neck and cheeks with a twinge of red. She was thankful he didn’t notice. She guessed that it was fair. Rebecca had a crush on the guy she was interested in and Savvy had one on hers. It was odd; they had never fought over boys. None of them were worth losing their special bond against the painful world.
Savvy closed her eyes and breathed in deeply; fighting off the desire to tell him what happened last night. He deserved to know, but Rebecca deserved to be the one to tell him. And from what she gathered last night that was one of the first things on Rebecca’s agenda.
Savvy compared the two guys. They were both built like someone who spent hours a day in the gym. Long, lean muscles rippled under their skin when they moved their bodies. Their faces were different. Gabe’s was hardened, rugged, which was strange for someone so young. It was obvious he had a difficult life. Savvy could relate. Lucky’s face, however, was softer, but still strong. He was cute and Gabe was handsome. He was light and Gabe was darker. In that moment, Savvy did not envy Rebecca’s choice. They were both amazing specimens, both offered great potential.
"Yea, it’s beautiful here in the mornings and evenings, but the afternoons, well you know." Savvy decided she better answer him before he realized she was focused on introspection. While Savvy was good at acting like she was an extrovert, she was more comfortable being introverted and reflective. In that way, she was more like Rebecca than either of them recognized.
Lucky nodded. "It feels like we’re walking in an oven." He chuckled lightly.
"That’s a perfect description!" Savvy laughed with him. She couldn't help but laugh. It was easy to see why her sister found him so appealing. Everything about him was perfect. She diverted her attention back to the rim of her cup, feeling guilty for admiring Rebecca’s boyfriend. “Did you see the local news fry an egg on the dash of a car the other day? It was a story about how hot it gets in a car during the heat of the day. They were trying to point out that leaving an animal or baby in the car in this heat is deadly.” It was an interesting take on shock value and Savvy felt it was also a great change of subject topic. Who didn’t find science experiments in the real world interesting?
He chuckled, “no, I didn’t, but now I think I will have to try it as an experiment.”
“Just don’t eat the egg.” Savvy offered a weak grin over the rim of her cup. The silence stretched out between them as they continued to watch the battle in the sky.
Finally, Lucky asked, "What’s wrong?" His eyes searched the side of Savvy’s face. She was ashamed to admit she felt the heat from his intense gaze. She never liked it when people stared too long at her, and his searching made it more unbearable.
"I’m worried about my sister." She blurted it out. She really hated that about him. It was impossible to lie to Lucky when he asked a direct question. She noticed that special skill of his this weekend. So instead of letting him probe for answers with those deadly golden amber eyes she decided to lead the conversation. "Becca hasn’t been acting herself lately." Savvy sipped the tea and enjoyed the taste of milk, cinnamon and cloves on her tongue before going on. "She seems more self-destructive than normal. If I know my sister - that is dangerous."
"Why do you say that?" Lucky trained those eyes on hers.
And with one question he was back in control. "Surely you see it; skipping school, yes I knew about that! The lack of involvement or interest in school work. She was up late last night working on an extra-credit paper for history which happens to be her favorite subject. Not to mention the way she’s been skipping family commitments. However, the biggest concern is that she hasn’t picked up her guitar or song book since the incident." That last one really scared Savvy.