As I opened the gate to the yard, Dad was heading for the cow shed. When he saw me, his face lit up with a broad smile. I offered to help with the milking so we could talk but he told me to go in right away and speak to my mam.
‘She’s missed you, lad. You’ll be a sight for sore eyes.’
Patting me on the back, he went off to do his milking, but before I’d taken half a dozen paces Jack came out of the barn and made straight for me.
‘What brings you back so soon?’ he asked. He seemed a little bit cool. Well, to be honest, he was more cold than cool. His face was sort of twisted up, as if he were trying to scowl and grin at the same time.
‘The Spook’s sent me home for a few days. I’ve to make up my mind whether to carry on or not.’
‘So what will you do?’
‘I’m going to talk to Mam about it.’
‘No doubt you’ll get your own way as usual,’ Jack said.
By now Jack was definitely scowling and it made me feel that something had happened while I’d been away. Why else was he suddenly so unfriendly? Was it because he didn’t want me coming home?
‘And I can’t believe you took Dad’s tinderbox,’ he said.
‘He gave to me,’ I said. ‘He wanted me to have it.’
‘He offered it, but that didn’t mean you had to take it. The trouble with you is that you only think about yourself. Think of poor Dad. He loved that tinderbox.’
I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to get into an argument. I knew he was wrong. Dad had wanted me to have the tinderbox, I was sure of it.
‘While I’m back, I’ll be able to help out,’ I said, trying to change the subject.
‘If you really want to earn your keep, then feed the pigs!’ he called, as he turned to walk away. It was a job neither of us liked much. They were big, hairy, smelly pigs and always so hungry that it was never safe to turn your back on them.
Despite what Jack had said, I was still glad to be home. As I crossed the yard I glanced up at the house. Mam’s climbing roses covered most of the wall at the back, and always did well even though they faced north. Now they were just shooting, but by mid-June they’d be covered in red blossoms. The back door was always jamming because the house had once been struck by lightning. The door had caught fire and had been replaced, but the frame was still slightly warped, so I had to push hard to force it open. It was worth it because the first thing I saw was Mam’s smiling face. She was sitting in her old rocking chair in the far corner of the kitchen, a place where the setting sun couldn’t reach. If the light was too bright, it hurt her eyes. Mam preferred winter to summer and night to day.
She was glad to see me all right, and at first I tried to delay telling her I’d come home to stay. I put on a brave face and pretended to be happy but she saw right through me. I could never hide anything from her.
‘What’s wrong?’ she asked.
I shrugged and tried to smile, probably doing even worse than my brother at disguising my feelings.
‘Speak up,’ she said. ‘There’s no point in keeping it bottled up.’
I didn’t answer for a long time because I was trying to find a way to put it into words. The rhythm of Mam’s rocking chair gradually slowed, until at last it came to a complete halt. That was always a bad sign.
‘I’ve passed my month’s trial and Mr Gregory says it’s up to me whether I carry on or not. But I’m lonely, Mam,’ I confessed at last. ‘It’s just as bad as I expected. I’ve got no friends. Nobody of my own age to talk to. I feel so alone - I’d like to come back and work here.’
I could have said more and told her how happy we used to be on the farm when all my brothers were living at home. I didn’t -I knew that she missed them too. I thought she’d be sympathetic because of that but I was wrong.
There was a long pause before Mam spoke and I could hear Ellie sweeping up in the next room, singing softly to herself as she worked.
‘Lonely?’ Mam asked, her voice full of anger rather than sympathy. ‘How can you be lonely? You’ve got yourself, haven’t you? If you ever lose yourself, then you’ll really be lonely. In the meantime, stop complaining. You’re nearly a man now and a man has to work. Ever since the world began, men have been doing jobs they didn’t like. Why should it be any different for you? You’re the seventh son of a seventh son, and this is the job you were born to do.’
‘But Mr Gregory’s trained other apprentices,’ I blurted out. ‘One of them could come back and look after the County. Why does it have to be me?’
‘He’s trained many, but precious few completed their time,’ Mam said, ‘and those that did aren’t a patch on him. They’re flawed or weak or cowardly. They walk a twisted path, taking money for accomplishing little. So there’s only you left now, son. You’re the last chance. The last hope. Someone has to do it. Someone has to stand against the dark. And you’re the only one who can.’
The chair began to rock again, slowly picking up speed.
‘Well, I’m glad that’s settled. Do you want to wait for supper or shall I put you some out as soon as it’s ready?’ Mam asked.
‘I’ve had nothing to eat all day, Mam. Not even breakfast.’
‘Well, it’s rabbit stew. That ought to cheer you up a bit.’
I sat at the kitchen table feeling as low and sad as I could ever remember while Mam bustled about the stove. The rabbit stew smelled delicious and my mouth began to water. Nobody was a better cook than my mam and it was worth coming home, even for just a single meal.
With a smile, Mam carried across a big steaming plate of stew and set it down before me. ‘I’ll go and make up your room,’ she said. ‘Now you’re here, you might as well stay a couple of days.’
I mumbled my thanks and wasted no time in starting. As soon as Mam went upstairs, Ellie came into the kitchen.
‘Nice to see you back, Tom,’ she said with a smile. Then she looked down at my generous plate of food. ‘Would you like some bread with that?’
‘Yes, please,’ I said, and Ellie buttered me three thick slices before sitting at the table opposite me. I finished it all without once coming up for air, finally wiping my plate clean with the last big slice of freshly baked bread.