Adne bristled, feeling she hadn’t earned a reproach from Shay’s mother. Of course she hadn’t visited Shay at Rowan Estate; she was a Searcher, not one of his classmates from Vail.
“No,” Adne answered slowly, reminding herself that Sarah wasn’t trying to give offense, she was grieving her son. “I never came to Rowan Estate while Shay lived here. I think only Calla did.”
“The wolf girl.”
Sarah’s words were so rough with anger that Adne could only nod.
“She had no right . . .” Sarah’s voice trailed off as her eyes closed. Tears ran unchecked down her cheeks.
Edging closer to Sarah, Adne whispered, “Had no right?”
“To take him.” Sarah broke down into a fresh round of sobs.
Adne wanted to defend Calla but wondered if that might make things worse. She didn’t know what to do. Had Sarah and Tristan requested that Shay’s room be left intact so they might have a chance to get to know their son through the artifacts of his life at Rowan Estate?
“I don’t understand,” Sarah continued raggedly. “No one does. I’ve spent hours with the Scribes, with Anika. No one can explain to me why my son is gone.”
“He’s not exactly gone.” No matter the circumstance, Adne didn’t want to just leave the poor woman. She had to offer Sarah some sort of hope. “He’s with the pack. And Calla loves him. I think they’ll be happy together.”
Apparently that was the wrong thing to say.
Sarah drew a hissing breath and glared at Adne. “I am his mother. Do you think some girl he’d known a few months could ever care for him as much as I do?”
“I just meant . . .”
“He was three years old.” Sarah’s voice was thick. “And I would have been able to accept those lost years if he were here now. We could have been a family again, but we had only moments before—”
Unable to continue, Sarah bowed her head. She didn’t make a sound, but her shoulders shook violently and somehow her silent weeping was much more terrible.
Sarah’s right. It shouldn’t have happened. It goes against everything we know about Guardians. Shay’s mother had been human, a Searcher. Yet somehow Shay had willed himself to remain a wolf even after he’d closed the Rift, thereby returning Guardians to their natural state. According to those rules, Shay should have remained human. He hadn’t.
Adne thought of what she’d discovered about the Scion’s lineage. To have the power of the Nether coursing through his veins must have affected his ability to control the outcome of his transformation, even if subconsciously.
A murmur caught Adne’s attention. At first she thought it was simply a return of audible evidence of Sarah’s weeping, but then she realized Sarah was speaking.
“I’m sorry?” Adne took a step forward, daring to rest her hand on Sarah’s shoulder. She drew a quick breath of relief when Sarah looked up at her with pleading, not hateful, eyes.
Sarah grasped Adne’s fingers, crushing them in a desperate grip. “No one will listen to me. Not Anika. Not even Tristan. No one understands how wrong this is. I can’t bear it.”
Adne returned Sarah’s grip, hoping to provide some reassurance that someone was listening to her . . . even if grief had driven Sarah to ranting.
“I know how hard it is to lose family,” Adne said quietly. “I lost everyone. The war took my mother first. Then my father. And finally my brother.”
The image of Ren’s wolf lurking in the shadows of Rowan Estate flashed through Adne’s mind, but she quickly pushed it away. Her mind had proven untrustworthy of late, but a comforting idea formed in Adne’s thoughts. Maybe her nightmares and visions weren’t the corruption of insanity but merely a side effect of her grief.
“Forgive me, dear,” Sarah said. “I mean no harm in this. Of course I’m sorry for your losses, but don’t you see that it’s not the same?”
Adne withdrew her hand from Sarah’s, which took some effort.
“Don’t be angry.” Sarah stood up and faced Adne. There was a wild resolve in her eyes that Adne found unsettling. “I don’t mean that my grief is more than yours, only that your family was killed in the war. My Seamus isn’t dead. He was taken. And it was wrong. I know he wants to come back to us . . . I saw him.”
Her tone became accusing. “I saw him with you.”
“With me?” Adne’s mind filled with the memory of wolves’ howls. “Shay was the wolf who saved me?”
Sarah’s eyes widened and Adne held her breath, regretting the slip.
“You remember?” Sarah asked. “You remember that Shay came to you?”
Adne shook her head. “I don’t remember Shay—I just remember hearing wolves.”
I thought I remembered Ren.
“Surely you understand why I have to help Shay.” Twisting the blanket in her hands, Sarah continued, “All that Tristan and I sacrificed for the cause, and this is our reward? I won’t abide it.”
Adne inched back toward the door as the implications of Sarah’s words sank in. If Adne had feared for her own sanity, in this moment she was much more worried about the fragility of Sarah’s mind.
“Maybe I should take you back to the Academy,” Adne offered.
Sarah’s lip curled in disgust. “To my so-called friends? The ones who offer embraces and condolences but won’t help me?”
“Help you do what?” Adne didn’t want to ask but felt she had to. Whatever mad road Sarah was determined to walk down, Adne thought it best that someone knew about it.
“Get my son back.”
That’s impossible.
Adne didn’t say it. It wouldn’t help anything, and from the way Sarah had been going on, Adne figured other Searchers had already tried to tell Sarah the same. All Adne could do was find someone who was close to Sarah and hope they could help her get over this delusion.
“Who are you?” Sarah asked sharply. She was looking past Adne into the hall.
Adne turned to see a tall, slender girl with pointed features and silken hair the shade of mink.
“I’m sorry, I think I’m lost. I was with the tour,” the girl answered.
Adne frowned, knowing the tour should have reached the opposite end of the mansion by now. This girl was clearly one of those visitors who thought it clever to slip away from the group and snap pictures of the off-limits sections of the estate.