Unfathomable Kalika, Kali Ma, where are you now?
I finish my tale and Paula sits quietly staring at me with her warm eyes.
"She said she saw you before," she finally says. "Do you think she was lying?"
"It was impossible for me to tell if she was telling the truth or not," I explain. "She seemed to operate under a psychic shield. It was very strongeven I could not penetrate it. Certainly I could not bend her will to mine."
"But there wouldn't be any reason for her to lie about such a detail."
"Perhaps. But still,I don't remember her."
Paula stares out over the sparkling water at the small island in the center of the bay where Kalika met her end. "You know I have begun to remember many things, Sita,"she says softly.
I nod. I've suspected for a while that certain memories were returning to her, but I have waited until she felt ready to talk about them.
"Suzama?"I say.
"Yes. I remember Suzama."
I suspected this, but still the statement is stunning to me. Paula remembers Suzama, my mentor from my time in ancient Egypt, because she is the reincarnation of Suzama. It is the only logical explanation, and I ask her to confirm the truth for me. Paula shakes her head.
"We may be the same from life to life," she says. "But we are also different. Do not expect Suzama to answer when you speak to me. Her time was long ago."
I probe deep into Paula's brown eyes and feel a rush of joy, and of sorrow. "But she is in you," I protest. "A part of me must have known that from the beginning. When I met you at the bookstore, I knew I could not leave you. You are Suzama, the great oracle. Can't you just admit it?"
She is flattered by my praise, and yet unmoved as well. "Perhaps I can't because I'm not able to see what happens next." She pauses. "Yet I knew, when you were down in Los Angeles, that you would confront something very old."
I lower my voice. "Then you know who she was?"
She shakes her head. "I have a feel for her, that is all." Reaching down, she touches the clear water, then feels John's feet to see if they are getting cold. She adds in a serious voice. "Interesting how she mentioned the harvest."
"Yes. I didn't understand that. What harvest was she talking about?"
Paula is thoughtful, her eyes focused far away, as Suzama often was.
"There is a time coming soon," she says, "when everything will change. I have seen this in what people call visions, but which aren't visions at all. People will either move forward or else repeat what they have already done.
I have to think about this.
Suzama never made casual prophecies.
"What will people move forward to?" I ask.
"An entirely different type of life. One we cannot even imagine as we sit here. Those who do go forward will live in light and bliss."
"But Heidi was wicked. Why would she want to increase such a harvest?"
Paula wipes the water off John's feet and warms them in her lap. "There are two kinds of harvests," she says. "There are two kinds of people. Those who serve others and those who serve themselves. You know thisit is nothing new. Of course, no one is one hundred percent one way or the other. No one is a perfect sinner or a perfect saint. But where there is a dominance of self-interest, a negative harvest will come about for that person. Where there is a dominance of love, a positive harvest will happen."
"You know these things for fact?"
"Yes."
"Suzama... " I begin.
She smiles. "Paula. Please?"
"Paula. When will the harvest occur?"
"The date is not set. But some time in the next twenty-five years the change will occur."
"Will everyone be harvested?"
"Not at all."
"What is the criteria?"
"I knew you would ask that. The criteria, I believe, is the same for both sides, positive and negative. Yet it has nothing to do with religious persuasion, higher learning, physical health or beauty, relative importance in society. None of these qualities will matter."
"Then what will the criteria be?" I repeat.
"It is difficult to describe."
I am frustrated. "Try."
Paula laughs, and so does her child. John is for the most part a happy baby, but he can cry in the middle of the night with the best of them. Many times I have changed his diapers to allow Paula to sleep. Since drinking my daughter's blood, I seldom need to rest. "Life is the criteria," she says finally. "Who is alive, who is not. Remember, those who are negative can be more full of life than the most positive of people." She punches me in the arm. "Take you for example."
I am her naive student, from long ago, and her remark wounds. It strikes me then how much our relationship has changed since we met. Then I was the sole knower of profound secrets. Now I truly feel I am her student and study at her knee. Mystery surrounds her like a halo. I love her so much, but she scares me.
"Am I only fit for the negative side?" I ask quietly.
She laughs more. "Silly vampire. No, don't be ridiculous.Who more than you is ready to give her life for others?"
I gesture helplessly. "But I have killed so many over the years."
She is compassionate. "It doesn't matter, Sita. Really, I know this for a fact."
I have to smile. "I suppose you would since you have such a special child."
"You understand what I am saying. The issue of harvest is separate from the type of harvest. Whether a person will go forward is dependent on his or her life vibration. Whether he or she will enter a positive realm or a negative one depends on the quality of his or her heart."
"Tell me more about this next realm?"
"I cannot."
"But you see it?"
"Yes. But words do not describe it. The next dimension is even beyond the realms souls encounter when they die." She pauses to run her hand through John's silky brown hair. How will the world react, I wonder, to a brown messiah? Of course, no race would satisfy everyone. Paula adds, "The coming harvest will affect heaven and earth."
"Is that why John was born? To increase the positive harvest?"
"Yes. But.. ."She does not finish.
"What?"
Paula frowns and then sighs. "Something is wrong. The plan is off."