"I repeat, the council only seeks any information that will help them maintain the peace treaty with the Clann. Nothing more."
I searched his thoughts. He was telling the truth.
The anger seeped out of me, leaving a horrible sinking feeling behind. "I really don't want to go back there." I tried to control my voice, but a slight tremble snuck into it anyway. "You of all people have got to understand what it's like...finally getting to be with the person you love, facing all that hatred and judgment. The descendants are going to want to kill me for turning Tristan! In fact, they probably won't even want us back there."
It was Dad's turn to stare at me with one eyebrow arched. "Do not think I have not read Emily's messages requesting Tristan's return to Jacksonville. I am well aware that his mother and the rest of the Clann seek reassurance that he is no longer a danger."
I turned away and crossed my arms.
"Savannah, do try to be mature about this. We must return to Jacksonville. It is the only way to reassure the Clann that you and Tristan are no longer a threat to them. And the council is relying upon us to provide them with accurate warnings only the two of you can provide. Think of the good that you can do, the lives that you can save, by helping to prevent another war."
Great. Dad must have picked up a few of my mother's guilt trip methods. He was doing a really great job of making me feel like a selfish child.
I hung my head and closed my eyes. I had gone through so much for years now because of the stupid hate and fear between the vamps and the Clann...I'd given up my dreams of being a dancer on my high school dance team so I wouldn't reveal my vamp abilities to the world. I'd risked everything, even losing my Nanna, by breaking the rules to date Tristan. I'd even given up being with Tristan for months just to make the vampire council and the Clann happy.
And now, when it finally seemed that Tristan and I could safely be together at last without breaking any rules, without having to sneak around...now when his memory had finally returned and I could have my Tristan back again...the council had the nerve to make yet another demand.
I was so tired of it all...of the hate and the fear and the whispers and judging stares, of having to do what everyone else wanted. When would it matter what I wanted? Or what Tristan wanted? Even now, after everything we'd gone through, we still weren't free.
Dad tried to rest a hand on my shoulder, but I took a step forward so his hand fell away.
He sighed. "Do you not miss your friends and your dance team?"
I shrugged one shoulder. "I assumed I would never see them again."
"Well, now you can."
I didn't want to, but I could hear my dad's thoughts as he struggled for some new and more compelling argument to try with me. As my dad, he hated having to push me on this issue. But as a representative of the vampire council, he was duty bound to. He would be forced to badger me endlessly until I gave in.
I gritted my teeth and held up a hand to stop him. "Fine. We'll go back to Jacksonville. But only when Tristan is ready. Until then, until he's sure he's in control, we're staying right here. Okay?"
"Agreed."
Tristan stayed out at the ridge all day. By sunset, I couldn't take it anymore and had to join him.
"How are you feeling?" I asked, reaching out to him and then hesitating before dropping my hand at my own side again. Maybe he still wanted to be alone.
He continued to stare out at the sky, now slowly darkening beneath the early winter sunset. "I remember everything. Dad and Mom, Emily and Gowin. You and me. The Clann and the vampire council. The battle at the Circle, and Gowin's sucker punch through my back. You turning me."
I froze, fearing my nightmare was about to come true. Did he hate me for the selfish decision I'd made, for my inability to let him die?
He finally turned his head to look at me. "Thanks, by the way."
"Sorry about the amnesia. I didn't know about it till after I'd turned you, since I never had it. I didn't know it would be so complete or last this long."
He gave a half shrug and returned to staring at the sky. "It's over. That's all that matters."
I nodded in silence, not knowing what else to say. After spending so many days trying to adjust to the childlike and helpless Tristan, I had to readjust to the return of the old Tristan. Except he still wasn't quite himself.
For instance, he hadn't reached out to touch me in any way yet.
"Sorry. Guess I've been a little lost lately." Sighing, he reached out to take my hand and gently tug me closer.
As soon as his hand touched mine, warmth spread over my skin and the tension melted from my whole body. It was going to be okay now. We'd made it through the hardest part.
I sat down beside him before relief could make my legs give out beneath me, wrapped an arm across the small of his back and rested my cheek against the muscled curve of his shoulder. "I missed you. The real you, I mean."
"I missed me, too." He raised our joined hands to press a slow kiss to each of my fingers.
I raised my head, and he leaned over and kissed my lips. A heady mix of relief and love rose up through my body, stealing my breath and driving me to wrap both arms around him. The intensity of the emotions surprised both of us, and when we stopped to catch a breath, one corner of his mouth rose.
"Wow. You really did miss me, didn't you?"
"I was afraid... ." Too many emotions pounded through me to put them into words...the gut-wrenching fear of losing him when he nearly died, the horror of discovering I'd temporarily turned him into more animal than man, the responsibility of keeping him safe from his own actions and the fear of screwing up as his sire, being terrified for months that I'd only saved him physically but might never have the real Tristan back, the agonizing guilt and worry over whether I'd made the wrong decision after all by turning him. It was too much to describe out loud, so I simply let him see and feel all the emotions and memories inside my head.
"Hey, it's okay now," he murmured, cupping my face and using his thumbs to brush away my tears of relief. "I'm not going anywhere ever again. It's you and me till the end of time. Or at least until you decide you can't stand me anymore."
He pressed a slow, lingering kiss to my forehead, then each cheek, the tip of my nose and then my lips again.
And I was finally whole once more.