"That's why the Brat Twins call me a freak. Why did you even keep me?" I muttered then clamped my lips shut. I so had not meant to say that out loud.
She gripped my shoulders, forcing me to meet her gaze. "Savannah, from the moment I found out I was pregnant with you, you have been nothing short of a miracle. Do you understand? A miracle. Not strange, not scary, not a freak and certainly not a threat to anyone. You've always been a sweet, precious miracle born out of love."
A love that had lasted all of three years. "So if I was such a miracle, and you two were so in love you just had to break all the rules to be together...why'd you get divorced?"
She bit her lower lip, hesitating for a long time before sighing. "A lot of factors, I guess. Mostly, it was my fault. I was young, far too young to handle it all. And too young to really know what love was. I thought I was in love with your father. But now I know I was more in love with the idea of being with a vampire and breaking the rules. We were like Bonnie and Clyde, modern-day rebels running from our worlds' laws, hiding out on the lam." She grinned. "It was a lot of fun. Until we had a baby who needed safety and security. Then suddenly being on the run wasn't so much fun anymore. When I realized I was responsible for your life and protecting you, it just didn't make sense anymore to be with your father. The council and the Clann both agreed you and I could live with your grandmother as long as I ended my marriage. And while I still loved your father, I wasn't in love with him anymore. Loving your father was an adventure and a selfish fantasy, and it was great while it lasted. But having you made me realize I needed to wake up, grow up and think about others for a change."
"Let me get this straight. You broke up with Dad for me?"
"Not just for you. For peace between the Clann and the vampires, too. Both groups have members all over the world. If your father and I had stayed together, worldwide war could have broken out again between them. A lot of people would have died, and that would have been my fault. And I didn't love your father enough anymore for it to be worth that."
"But why come back to Jacksonville? Why not raise me somewhere else? Someplace where there weren't as many Clann around?"
She smiled and shrugged. "Because Jacksonville has always been my home. And besides, I needed your grandma's help to raise you. Dhampir babies don't exactly come with a handbook, you know."
I managed a smile for her, but it faded fast. "Except, now I have to go to school with kids who seem to know what I am. And call me freak every day."
Mom hugged me. "I know it's hard, hon. But you've got to learn how to live your own life and don't worry about what the Clann thinks, or what the vampire council thinks, or what anybody says about you. None of this changes who you are inside. That's only up to you and what you choose. And even though this is all a shock, and maybe things in your life might start to change a little here and there, I promise you're going to be okay. As long as you follow the rules, that is."
Which was to stay away from the Clann. Yeah, I got it already. Except... "Mom, you and Nanna used to be in the Clann, too. What if I-"
"Don't worry. Like you teens love to say...we've got skills." She gave a lopsided grin. "Or at least your Nanna does. All I ever learned how to do was throw stuff and make fire. And even that was only because your Nanna absolutely insisted on it for minimal protection."
"Why didn't you want to learn how to do magic?"
"Hon, you live in the post-Harry Potter world, where you teens think magic is awesome. I lived in the pre-Harry Potter times. I was witchy when witchy wasn't cool."
Huh. "What about the Clann kids at school? Dad said to avoid them, but how can I when I've got classes with them, have to pass them in the halls, eat with them in the cafeteria?"
"You should be okay at a distance. Like your father said, they've probably got charms on them to dull their attraction to any vampire. And even if you do start to feel the bloodlust at some point, if you keep your distance and pay attention to your body, you'll know if it becomes a problem. If it does, you call me or Nanna or your father immediately and go to the nurse's station till one of us gets there. Okay?"
I thought of how close Tristan sat behind me in algebra, and the pain in my chest and stomach that hit me every time he was near. Keeping my distance might be a problem. I'd just have to try to sort out my usual confused feelings around him from anything new that might come up. Like a sudden attraction to his neck.
"Why is the Clann even letting us stay here? Wouldn't they want me as far away from them and their kids as possible?"
Her smile turned sad. "You know that saying 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer'? I think it's like that. They don't want you to get too close or spend time alone with any of their descendants. But they also want to be able to keep an eye on you. Plus there's the chance that one day you might decide to...help them out."
"Help them out?"
"You know. Be on their side if there's ever another war with the vampires."
The Clann thought I would side with them against my own father? I snorted. They must be insane. After the way the Clann kids had treated me and my family for the past five years...
Well, not all of them had bullied me all the time. A memory flashed through my mind of emerald eyes staring back at me. Of strong, warm hands on my shoulders, stopping me from falling in algebra class, when he could have just let me do a face-plant onto my desk.
"I guess it's a good thing I don't want to date anyone in the Clann anyways, huh?"
Laughing, Mom picked up a hairbrush and began to tug it through my tangled hair, ignoring my facial expression each time she found a new snag. "Uh, yeah. Dating someone from the Clann could start another war. Lordy, I can see it now. The Clann would think you were stalking one of their own to drain them. The vamps would think you were siding with the Clann. It'd be mass chaos in no time." She shook her head and grinned. "But we don't have to worry about that, right? You've hated the Clann's kids for years now."
I forced a weak chuckle and took the brush away from her before she could accidentally brush me bald. "Yeah. Right. They're first-class jerks."
"Any other questions?" Her tone had turned bright and cheerful, like she had simply been helping me with my home work or something.