When we were apart, I didn't recognize myself at all.
Something else that I remembered when I was away from Tristan was the continued absence of my father. My refusing to return his calls was way different from not getting any calls from him at all. Even when I'd refused to speak to him, Nanna had always mentioned when he'd called. But he hadn't since October. He'd warned me that he might not be able to contact us for a while, so I was trying hard not to worry about him. But he hadn't said he'd be out of touch for months.
Mom and Nanna didn't seem worried about his absence. They claimed the entire vampire society got together for some huge gathering every ten years or so, and that he must be busy helping prepare for this event. Yeah, right. What party, no matter how big, took four months to plan and kept you from checking on your kid once a week? Something was up. But until my father decided to share, I was in the dark and trying not to care enough to worry about him.
And trying not to let anyone see it, either. After all, how could I possibly explain?
Going to bed early on New Year's Eve, as I'd promised Tristan, was tougher than I'd imagined. Mom had made a point to be home off the road for a change and wanted to stay up to see the replay of the televised New York City ball drop at our local midnight hour. She even tried to bribe me with a bottle of sparkling apple cider, my favorite. So guilty I could hardly speak, I claimed I was too tired and went to bed right after the live ball drop at eleven o'clock instead.
The scene I found waiting for me in the dream made me temporarily forget the guilt, though. I'd landed in the middle of a city packed with a huge, noisy crowd. It was totally crazy.
"Tristan?" I yelled, though I had no idea how he could possibly hear me.
A broad aisle had been roped off in the center of the crowd. Tristan walked along this aisle toward me, wearing jeans, a black wool coat and the blue-and-gold scarf and hat I'd spent four weeks working with Nanna to learn how to make him for Christmas. The knit hat hugged his head, making his hair peek out along the edges in little curls I wanted to grab and tug. The blue in the hat made his green eyes sparkle.
"What do you think?" He held his arms out wide.
"This is nuts! When did you learn how to do this?" We'd both always been able to imagine small changes into being in our shared dreams, but never anything on this scale.
"I had a lot of free time to practice on all those nights when we couldn't connect."
"Well, I am definitely impressed. But where exactly is this supposed to be?"
"Times Square in New York City, of course. Best place in the world to ring in the new year! Or at least as much of it as I can remember from last year's trip."
I looked around me again, this time slower and with even more respect. "Wow. This is all from your memory?"
"Yeah. Have you ever been to the Big Apple?"
I shook my head. The only traveling I'd done was when Mom had moved from New Orleans back to East Texas when I was two, plus short weekend trips for dance competitions with the Charmers earlier this month, which unfortunately Tristan's parents hadn't let him go on.
"Great! Then if I mess up anything, you won't know it."
I laughed.
He reached into his coat pocket then pulled out a cardboard hat and two noisemakers. "Let's party!"
After the current song ended, he said, "Your turn. Play a song we can dance to."
"Me? I can't."
"Sure you can. Just pretend you're listening to it on your iPod."
"Tristan, I can't do magic. I don't know how!" I probably couldn't even manage it if I really tried because of my vampire side.
"Sweetheart, you already are. How do you think we dream connect? If you couldn't do magic, I'd be able to see you in your dreams, but you wouldn't be able to see or hear me."
That made me blink a few times. I'd been doing magic for years and didn't even realize it?
Experimenting, I thought of a song, imagining it playing over some unseen speaker system, and it blasted out, scaring a squeal out of me. Laughing, Tristan grabbed me around the waist and spun me. "Keep it going!"
It was hard at first to focus on both the song and dance with Tristan. Humming the music helped. After a while, I got the hang of it and discovered I was actually pretty good at remembering all the notes of the songs on my iPod's playlists. Once I relaxed, dancing in the middle of Times Square with Tristan was an absolute blast and exactly what I needed to take my mind off all the fears and guilt that dogged me when I was awake. It was one of the absolute best moments of my life, even if it was only a dream and the noisy crowd around us looked suspiciously two-dimensional.
"Tristan, why are all these people flat like cardboard cutouts?" I teased as he spun me out, twisted me, then tugged me back in to him.
His smile turned decidedly sheepish. "I only saw one side of them. I didn't really pay much attention to their backsides."
"Do your parents go to New York City often?"
"Yeah, usually every year for New Year's, at least. They like to check in on the Clann families there."
"Are there a lot of descendants there?"
He shrugged. "Maybe twenty or so. Nothing like East Texas. We've got just over a hundred in this area."
"So why didn't you go to New York this year?"
He changed the music to a slow song so he could hold me close. It took real effort not to melt into a mindless puddle. "What, and miss this with you? No, thanks. Besides, Emily wanted to go to some local party." He nuzzled the side of my neck with his nose, tickling a laugh out of me.
"And you? Are you missing any parties right now?" Ones he would be having fun at if not for me. Crap. As soon as the words were spoken, I couldn't get the thought out of my head again.
"Nope. I'm right where I want to be." He shivered in my arms.
"Cold?" I asked, distracted. Feeling a little naughty, I imagined gloves on my hands and grinned when they appeared. Then I pressed my gloved hands to his cheeks to warm them.
"In real life, yeah, probably. It was a little chilly when I fell asleep outside."
That got my attention.
"You're sleeping outside?" My voice rose to a shriek. I stumbled to a stop, making him trip over my toes. Was he crazy?
"I have to. It's the only way I can get around whatever spells my parents hid in my bedroom to keep us from dream connecting. But it's okay, I'm in a tent tonight. Next time I'll just have to remember to use a warmer sleeping bag."