Oddly, she hardly ever came here—only a handful of times since she had lived here—yet she still felt comforted by its presence as she walked past it every day, and by the sound of its bells. She would often open her bedroom window at night, and fall asleep to the sound of its chimes, which rang out to the abridged tunes of various classical composers.
She also really liked the priest. She had only met him a handful of times over the years, but each time had left a great impression. He was young, in his 40s, tall and slim, with a kind, compassionate face and longish, sandy brown hair, freckles on his cheeks matching the color of his hair. He was soft-spoken, quick to smile, and self-effacing. He always shook everybody’s hands with two of his, clasping their hands warmly, embracing them in his own. The few times she had sought him out, like when she was upset she was unable to have a second child, he had always managed to make her feel better. Caitlin felt that she could tell him anything.
The large oak door creaked as she opened it, and her eyes adjusted from the bright sunlight of the day to the dim interior. As she stepped in, she realized the church was completely empty—of course, it would be, at lunchtime on a weekday—and she suddenly felt self-conscious. She felt as if she were walking into someone’s home unannounced, as if the door were only unlocked by accident.
It was a grand interior, the arched ceilings rising a hundred feet, filled with stained-glass and with endless wooden pews, all empty. The floors were comprised of large slabs of dark stone, well-worn, with a wide aisle which led to an elaborate altar, backed by stained-glass windows.
“Hello?” Caitlin called out tentatively, her voice echoing.
She waited. There was no response.
“Father McMullen?” she called out, louder.
Her voice echoed back to her, with no response.
Slowly, her eyes began to adjust to the dim interior. A passing cloud lifted, revealing the sun, which flooded the stained glass in different colors. The muted light was peaceful in here: it felt timeless, like a sanctuary. As if all her troubles were left behind those doors.
Caitlin wondered if she should leave. But it was hard to walk away. A part of her felt comforted being here; for some reason, she felt some sort of connection to being in a church, even though she wasn’t particularly religious. She couldn’t understand it. She could count on her fingers the number of times she had been in one. Yet every time she entered one, she felt some sort of mysterious connection to her past. She thought of her vampire journal. Were those real memories?
She found herself walking slowly down the aisle, her footsteps echoing, gravitating towards the altar. At the end was an enormous cross, covered in gold foil, and as she walked closer, she was suddenly struck with memories, flashbacks. She saw herself walking down an aisle, in a grand church, Caleb by her side. She saw herself in one church after the next, each more and more elaborate, in England, Scotland, Italy, France. She saw herself in the Notre Dame in Paris. In the Duomo in Florence. In Westminster Abbey. In each, Caleb was by her side. She suddenly saw her and Caleb’s wedding. She saw them standing before a castle, in Scotland, hundreds of people in attendance, walking down an aisle covered in rose petals. She saw a sky lit up by the most beautiful sunset she had ever seen. It was magical.
She opened her eyes and wondered if that had all been a fantasy? She stood before the altar, staring at the shining, gold cross, and tried to focus. She felt connected to this cross. To Jesus. She couldn’t understand why. The thought of Jesus being her father in heaven was reassuring to her somehow. Was that because she had never known her father in real life?
She forced herself to focus on Scarlet. She felt waves of desperation overcome her, and found herself clasping her hands in prayer. She was desperate for help, and she silently prayed for a miracle.
She felt weak. She went to the pews and sat a few rows from the front. As she did, she looked up and noticed an open Bible. It was a thick book, and the header read: The New Testament, The Book of Luke. She scanned the pages, looking for a sign, wondering if her prayer had been answered. She read:
“I grant you power and authority over every demon, power and authority over every disease.” Her heart raced. Was it a message?
She propped her elbows on the bench before her, rested her face in her hands, and silently prayed. She prayed for help for Scarlet. For herself. For her family. She had never felt so alone, so desperate. She was soon crying. She felt like a broken woman. All the tension, all the stress of the last few days—her almost losing Scarlet, her fighting with Caleb, her meeting with Aiden—all came pouring out. Her cries filled the air.
“My child,” came a soft voice.
Caitlin turned and saw Father McMullen, approaching her from the far side of the room. He crossed the cavernous room, his footsteps echoing, and Caitlin stood, embarrassed. She smoothed her skirt, and wiped the tears from her cheeks.
“I’m sorry father, I didn’t mean to barge in like this,” she said, her voice shaking. “I realize you’re probably not open now—”
He raised a palm to stop her, as he broke into a soft, warm smile.
“We are always open,” he said. “It’s Caitlin, isn’t it? Caitlin Paine?” She nodded back, impressed he remembered.
“I never forget a face,” he said. “I am more than happy to see you here. I am sorry I was not here to greet you personally. You caught me on my lunch break,” he added with a smile.
Caitlin smiled, reassured at his presence. He held out his palm, and she shook his hand. She felt warmth and reassurance as he clasped her hand in both of his and smiled warmly.
“I’m sorry,” she said, wiping away her tears.
He shook his head. “There is nothing to be sorry for. Our Lord in heaven appreciates heartfelt prayer.”
Caitlin sensed that she had come to the right place, that he was exactly the one she should talk to. She sighed, feeling some tension leaving her body.
“Would you like to talk?” he asked softly, after a few moments of silence.
“Yes, I would,” she replied.
“Let’s take a walk,” he said, and turned and led her across the room. “It’s a bit impersonal in here. Have you seen our new courtyard? It’s a gorgeous day, and everything is in bloom, and with the leaves falling, it’s a medley of color. I think you’ll find it heartwarming.”
“I’d like to see that,” she said, as they continued across the huge room.