PROLOGUE
The full moon has become my enemy.
I’m in a cavern, preparing myself for the most important night of my life. A few days earlier I had turned seventeen. Tonight a full moon will grace the sky. As I stand beneath it, the moonlight will wash over me and I—Lindsey Lancaster—will transform….
Into a wolf.
I’m a Shifter, a species of beings who for thousands of years have possessed the ability to shift from human to animal form. My clan’s destined animal is the wolf.
For as long as I can remember I’ve been anxiously awaiting this night, but for the past few weeks I’ve been dreading its arrival, because things suddenly became very confusing and complicated. My feelings, my emotions—they were all over the place. My heart was telling me one thing, my head another.
Connor and I have been best friends forever. Our families always hang out together in the outside world, where we all pretend that we don’t have this amazing ability, where we pretend we’re like the Statics, those who can’t morph into another shape. Our parents are convinced that Connor and I are destined for each other.
Sometimes I fear that Connor and I got caught up in their dreams for us and decided those dreams were ours, too. One night, in front of everyone, Connor declared me his mate. I was thrilled that he held such intense feelings for me, because I thought I felt the same for him. Our families celebrated. In the tradition of our kind, he had my name tattooed in a Celtic symbol on his left shoulder—our equivalent of getting engaged. Our fate was sealed.
But then Rafe returned home this summer after a year away at college, and I began to notice him in ways I never had before. When he speaks, his deep voice is laced with a little bit of a rasp—so sexy. He doesn’t talk often, except when he has something important to say, and when he does, my toes tingle. His dark eyes have the ability to hold me captive, to make my heart beat like thunder. And when he drops that dangerous gaze to my lips, I want to melt into his arms and pull his mouth down to mine for a taste of the forbidden.
He possesses a wild streak, prefers to live life on the edge. He’s the big, bad wolf—pardon the pun. And something in him calls to the wildness in me…but it’s a call I can’t answer.
Connor is my destiny.
Two years older than I am, he’s already gone through his transformation. Tonight he’ll lead me through mine. I force myself to concentrate on Connor: his blond hair, his blue eyes, his crooked grin that always makes me smile. He’s waiting for me now, waiting to share the most important night of my life. He’ll hold me, guide me through the transition, and ensure that I survive. We’ll bond deeply and forever as we go through this experience together. That’s what is supposed to happen, anyway.
I study my reflection in the mirror. My eyes are hazel, although the color tends to shift with my mood. Tonight they look somehow more blue than green or brown. They’re sad when they should be filled with excitement at this moment, the kind of anticipation a girl feels right before the prom.
My white-blond hair hangs loosely around my shoulders. The white velvet robe I’m wearing caresses my bare skin, and nervousness descends as I realize that soon it will be the moonlight touching me—the moonlight and Connor.
I turn from the mirror and walk to the entrance of the cavern, where a cascading waterfall hides our lair from those who don’t know of its—of our—existence. I slip out from behind the curtain of water and circle the still pool that will soon reflect the rising moon.
I spy Connor waiting patiently for my arrival. Wearing a black robe, he holds out his hand, and I place my palm against his. His fingers—so long, so sure, so steady—close around mine, which suddenly seem too delicate and fragile for what is about to happen. As though sensing my apprehension, he draws me near. The familiarity of him gives me solace. He’s the one. He’s always been the one.
Leaning in, he brushes his lips over mine. My heart stutters with the enormity of what we’re about to do.
Holding my hand, he leads me toward the clearing, toward the waiting moon, toward forever as his mate.
And I just hope that I haven’t made the wrong choice. Otherwise, I’m walking straight into the single biggest mistake of my life.
ONE
Supposedly, dreams reflect our hidden fears and secret desires, all clamoring for attention. The one I’d had last night had been so vivid that even now, as evening drew near, it still made me squirm in my chair. I sat against a wall in the counsel room where the elders and the Dark Guardians—protectors of our society—were discussing how best to ensure our survival. Because I hadn’t yet experienced my first transformation, I was considered a novice and was not allowed to sit at the large, round table with the others. This was okay by me, because it gave me the freedom to let my mind wander—without anyone noticing that I wasn’t paying attention.
In my dream, I’d been standing in a clearing with my declared mate, Connor, our arms wrapped around each other so tightly that we could barely breathe. The full moon served as a spotlight.
Then dark clouds drifted over the moon, and everything went black. Still holding him near, I was acutely aware of the muscles and bones in his body undulating against me. He grew taller and broader. My fingers were in his hair, and I felt the strands thicken and lengthen. His mouth covered mine, but his lips were fuller than before. The kiss was hungrier than any he’d ever given me. It heated me from head to toe, and I thought I knew what it was to be a candle, melting from the scorching flame. I knew I should move away, but I clung to him as though I’d drown in a sea of doubts if I let go.
The hovering clouds floated away, and the moonlight illuminated us once again—only I was no longer in Connor’s arms. Instead I was pressing my body against Rafe’s, kissing him, yearning for his touch….
I shifted uncomfortably in my chair with the memory of how desperately I’d wanted Rafe. It was Connor I was supposed to long for. But I’d woken up in a tangle of sheets, clamoring for another of Rafe’s touches—even if it were only in a dream.
Squirming again, I felt a sharp elbow in my ribs.
“Be still, will you?” Brittany Reed whispered harshly beside me. Like me, she would soon be turning seventeen and would experience her first transformation with the next full moon.
I’d known Brittany since kindergarten. We were friends, but I’d never felt as close to her as I did to Kayla—whom I’d met only last summer, when her adoptive parents had brought her to the park to face her past. We’d connected on a deep level almost as soon as we met. We’d spent the past year sharing our lives through emails, text messages, and phone calls.