Chapter 9
“I’ve always known something about me was just a little off. It was one of those things I just embraced about myself. But now to find out that what I have been embracing was darkness, that because of my DNA I am actually prone to evil desires, let’s just say that I didn’t handle it real well. Okay, maybe that’s putting it a bit mildly.” ~Elora
“What exactly does that mean?” Elora asked and then added. “And if you give me a vague guy answer I swear I will mess you up.”
“You could hit him with your hammer,” Oakley offered up. Rin choked on a laugh as Cush turned his steely gaze on him. Oakley just shrugged.
Tony let out a deep breath. “Okay, dark elves 101 it is,” he quipped. “Dark elves aren’t called dark elves because they like to dress in black and wear really thick eyeliner.”
“Okay, I should have clarified that a smart ass answer will also get you messed up,” Elora said dryly.
“Could you let him finish before you mess him up please?” Cush asked her
“I make no promises.” She smiled as she felt his humor through the strange bond between them. Cush pulled her to him and wrapped an arm around her, securing her in front of him with her back against his chest.
Tony looked from Cush to Elora, obviously waiting on them. “As I was saying,” he started again, “dark elves are drawn to evil. Their very nature is preprogrammed to seek out the wicked things in this world. It’s like they have an addiction before ever having tasted the drug. Even if they are never exposed to evil, or to self-pleasing things, they would still have the innate need to seek it out. Las Vegas,” he motioned out towards the casino floor, “is a dark elf’s mecca. And if a dark elf that had never really given into their darker nature came to Vegas, it would be akin to taking a drug addict and dropping them in a field of opium.”
Tony’s words seemed to resonate down to her soul. She felt them in her very bones, in the cells that made up her body, and knew that he was right. She let her mind think back to the times in her life when she felt this same pull, although not anywhere near this intensity. She had even started a diary that nobody, not even Cassie, knew about because writing about how she felt seemed to help her control the impulses she didn’t understand. How many times had she been at a party and longed to dive into the liquor without thought of consequences? On the few dates she had allowed herself to go on, how hard had she fought desire that she didn’t understand? It wasn’t the same kind of desire she felt for Cush—not anywhere close—but it had been there, and she had been tempted and repulsed at the same time.
She felt Cush tense behind her as he picked up on her thoughts. She didn’t bother trying to hide them from him; she was tired of keeping this part of herself a secret. If she had to share it with someone, she was glad it was him.
“So I’m really evil?” The words just sort of spilled out without conscious effort or thought and then suddenly she was facing Cush and his hands were on her face, forcing her to look up at him. His eyes seemed to pulse with power and his handsome face was tense with the obvious effort to keep himself in check.
“You. Are. Not. Evil,” he said each word carefully, as if doing so would make them sink in. “We all desire things we shouldn’t at times. We all do things we shouldn’t. We all have the capacity for evil but that doesn’t make us evil.”
“You’re forgetting the fact that I have dark-elf DNA swirling around in my cells,” she pointed out unnecessarily.
“Regardless, you have not let it dictate who you are.”
Elora reached up and took his hands from her face and held them in hers. She understood what Cush was saying, but it didn’t take away the feelings churning inside of her, feelings that she didn’t feel totally in control of. The clearing of a throat had her turning to look at Tony.
“So you have dark-elf blood then?” he asked.
Lisa spoke before Elora could answer. “I was a Chosen to a dark elf, and Elora and Oakley are products of that mating.”
“Wait,” Elora swung around to face her brother as a thought suddenly hit her. “Why aren’t you trembling like a junkie? You have dark-elf blood running through your corrupt little veins too.”
Oakley shrugged. “I don’t know. I mean I feel a little off, like I’ve just drunk a Red Bull. Kind of geared up, ya know? But that’s all.”
“Oakley, you are older than Elora?” Tony asked.
Oakley nodded.
“And have you experienced more in life?”
Oakley grinned. “Is that your polite way of asking if I’ve tapped…”
“Oakley!” Lisa interrupted sharply.
“What? He asked,” he said pointing to Tony.
Tony rolled his eyes. “If Oakley has, uh what’s the word I’m looking for? If he has…”
“Oh, good grief. I’m seventeen, not a freaking child. Are you saying that because Oakley has had sex and probably done other things we really don’t want the details on, that for some reason it’s easier for him being here? And since I have not…”
“You’re a virgin?” she heard Cush’s voice rumble in her mind pulling her up short. She turned and looked at him. Her forehead scrunched up as she asked, “Do you really want to have that conversation right now?” She motioned to the room full of people.
“Later then,” he told her sternly.
She turned back to Tony, not wanting to even think about the conversation that would be happening between her and Cush. “So it’s harder for me because…”
“Because you haven’t given into that part of yourself,” he finished for her.
“But shouldn’t that make it easier?” she asked. “I mean if you’ve never had chocolate it wouldn’t be hard to turn it down because you wouldn’t know what you are missing, right? So why is this different?”
“Because it’s not a matter of you knowing you are missing out on something,” Tony explained. “It’s in your very nature. It’s a part of who you are and you will fight that part of you for the rest of your life, or you will give into it.”
Elora shivered under the ominous sound of his words. “Well, that’s a bummer.”
“Not exactly,” he responded.