“I had to ditch him. It was too obvious!” I continued as both of my parents’ tempers seemed to erupt out of the top of their heads. “It was making Jesse feel uncomfortable! And what’s the big deal about Gramercy Park? I’ve been there a million times with Angelo!”
“With Angelo, yes!” my dad said. “Not by yourself! Do you realize how dangerous that can be?”
“To be inside a locked park at night in one of the safest neighborhoods in Manhattan? No, I didn’t realize I was in mortal peril.”
My mom was pacing again. “This was a bad idea!” She was ranting, but I didn’t know if she was talking to me or to my dad. “I told you, didn’t I? I said, she’s too young, she’s not ready!”
“Just calm down,” my dad said.
“Will someone please explain to me what’s going on here?” I yelled back. “Why are we mad all of a sudden?”
“Maggie, please,” my dad said. “Just sit down.”
“I am sitting! Mom’s the one who’s standing!”
“You broke into the park, didn’t you?” my mom said. “Did Jesse see you?”
“I made him turn around,” I admitted. “But he didn’t care, he thought it was cool.”
My mom looked at my dad. “He thought it was cool,” she repeated.
“I just meant that he didn’t think it was a big deal!”
“How do you know that Jesse isn’t just feeding you information?” my dad asked. “To throw you off? Or that Armand isn’t giving him the wrong information so that Jesse won’t ruin the deal?”
“What, so you’re saying that Jesse works for his dad now? That’s crazy!”
“Well, you work for us,” my mom said.
“I don’t work for you!” I shot back. “I work for the Collective! And if you’d listen to what I’m telling you, you’d know that I was trying to do my job! For the Collective!”
All three of us were standing now, each in a different spot in the kitchen, a literal standoff.
“I mean,” I continued, “my whole job is to like Jesse Oliver, right? That was the assignment, if memory serves.”
“Your job is to pretend to like him,” my mom told me. “And to stop this article from running.”
“Don’t you think it’s sort of weird to pretend to like someone?” I said. “And sneaky? And maybe not very emotionally healthy?”
“That’s the job, kiddo,” my dad said. “We’re not here to make real friends.”
I don’t know if it was the lack of sleep, the lack of caffeine, or the fact that the Q, A, and Z keys were now deeply imprinted on my cheek, but that comment pushed me over the edge. “Exactly,” I said. “I’m not here to make friends. And that’s the problem. How come I don’t get to make any friends? How come I don’t get to go to a normal school or Halloween parties? How come you just decided all this for me?”
“Because you have a gift!” my mom said. “It’s more than a gift. You have this amazing, one-of-a-kind ability to open locks and safes, and you can use that ability to right wrongs in the world!”
“What if I don’t want to?”
That stopped the room. Even the clock on the wall seemed to stop ticking. “What do you mean, you don’t want to?” my dad said. “This is all you’ve talked about since you were four!”
“I’m not four anymore! Have you noticed? I’m almost seventeen, I’m almost an adult. Why don’t I get to make decisions about my life? What’s so wrong with my making a friend? Or worse, dating a boy? I also wanted to be a veterinarian and a cowgirl when I was four, but things change. Maybe I’ve changed, did you ever think of that?”
“You were born into this,” my mom said. “That’s life. You don’t always get to choose your options.”
“This isn’t the royal family!” I protested. “It’s not some blood lineage! This is crazier than the royal family, and that is saying something!”
“So, what?” my dad asked. “You don’t want to do this anymore? You’re done?”
“What if I am? Is that all you like about me, the fact that I can open locks and safes? Is that really all there is? You know, I’ll say this for Jesse. He has no idea what I can do and he doesn’t care. He still likes me.”
“Do you think he would still like you if he knew what you were doing?” My mom’s voice wasn’t angry anymore, just resigned. “Honey, look. Your dad and I love you very, very much. We would love you even if you sat and watched television all day. But this is our job. This is our family. This is what we do. And you don’t get to just throw all that away because you got an assignment to like a boy.”
“But how can you expect me to make a choice about my life, my future, when I know only one option? All I know is this job. Yeah, I’m good at safecracking, but what if I’m better at being a normal person? What if it makes me happier?”
Neither of my parents said anything.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” I sighed. “This is just a job. It’s my life, but it’s all about the job for you. I get it now.”
“Maggie …”
But I turned on my heel and walked away from my dad’s voice. “Just let her go,” I heard my mom say. And she was right. I needed time to think.