"After," she said. She didn't lower her gaze or look embarrassed, though I sensed sadness in her. "How much do you know?"
I glanced at Christian. "The basics."
She nodded. "I knew ... I knew what Lucas and Moira had become, but that still didn't prepare me. Mentally, physically, or emotionally. I think if I had to live through it again, I still wouldn't be ready. But after that night, I looked at myself - figuratively - and realized how defenseless I was. I'd spent my whole life expecting guardians to protect me and take care of me.
"And that's not to say the guardians aren't capable. Like I said, you could probably take me in a fight. But they - Lucas and Moira - cut down our two guardians before we realized what had happened. I stalled them from taking Christian - but just barely. If the others hadn't shown up, I'd be dead, and he'd - " She stopped, frowned, and kept going. "I decided that I didn't want to die that way, not without putting up a real fight and doing everything I could to protect myself and those I love. So I learned all sorts of self-defense. And after a while, I didn't really, uh, fit in so well with high society around here. So I moved to Minneapolis and made a living from teaching others."
I didn't doubt there were other Moroi living in Minneapolis - though God only knew why - but I could read between the lines. She'd moved there and integrated herself with humans, keeping away from other vampires like Lissa and I had for two years. I started to wonder also if there might have been something else there between the lines. She'd said she'd learned "all sorts of self-defense" - apparently, more than just martial arts. Going along with their offense-defense beliefs, the Moroi didn't think magic should be used as a weapon. Long ago, it had been used that way, and some Moroi still secretly did today. Christian, I knew, was one of them. I suddenly had a good idea of where he might have picked up that kind of thing.
Silence fell. It was hard to follow up a sad story like that. But Tasha, I realized, was one of those people who could always lighten a mood. It made me like her even more, and she spent the rest of the time telling us funny stories. She didn't put on airs like a lot of royals did, so she had lots of dirt on everyone. Dimitri knew a lot of the people she spoke of - honestly, how did someone so antisocial seem to know everyone in Moroi and guardian society? - and would occasionally add some small detail. They had us in hysterics until Tasha finally looked at her watch.
"Where's the best place a girl can go shopping around here?" she asked.
Lissa and I exchanged looks. "Missoula," we said in unison.
Tasha sighed. "That's a couple hours away, but if I leave soon, I can probably still get in some time before the stores close. I'm hopelessly behind in Christmas shopping."
I groaned. "I'd kill to go shopping."
"Me too," said Lissa.
"Maybe we could sneak along...." I gave Dimitri a hopeful look.
"No," he said immediately. I gave a sigh of my own.
Tasha yawned again. "I'll have to grab some coffee, so I don't sleep on the drive in."
"Can't one of your guardians drive for you?"
She shook her head. "I don't have any."
"Don't have any ..." I frowned, parsing her words. "You don't have any guardians?"
"Nope."
I shot up. "But that's not possible! You're royal. You should have at least one. Two, really."
Guardians were distributed among Moroi in a cryptic, micromanaged way by the Guardian Council. It was kind of an unfair system, considering the ratio of guardians to Moroi. Non-royals tended to get them by a lottery system. Royals always got them. High-ranking royals often got more than one, but even the lowest-ranking member of royalty wouldn't have been without one.
"The Ozeras aren't exactly first in line when guardians get assigned," said Christian bitterly. "Ever since...my parents died...there's kind of been a shortage."
My anger flared up. "But that's not fair. They can't punish you for what your parents did."
"It's not punishment, Rose." Tasha didn't seem nearly as enraged as she should have been, in my opinion. "It's just...a rearranging of priorities."
"They're leaving you defenseless. You can't go out there by yourself!"
"I'm not defenseless, Rose. I've told you that. And if I really wanted a guardian, I could make a nuisance of myself, but it's a lot of hassle. I'm fine for now."
Dimitri glanced over at her. "You want me to go with you?"
"And keep you up all night?" Tasha shook her head. "I wouldn't do that to you, Dimka."
"He doesn't mind," I said quickly, excited about this solution.
Dimitri seemed amused by me speaking for him, but he didn't contradict me. "I really don't."
She hesitated. "All right. But we should probably go soon."
Our illicit party dispersed. The Moroi went one direction; Dimitri and I went another. He and Tasha made plans to meet up in a half hour.
"So what do you think of her?" he asked when we were alone.
"I like her. She's cool." I thought about her for a moment. "And I get what you mean about the marks."
"Oh?"
I nodded, watching my footing as we walked along the paths. Even when salted and shoveled, they could still collect hidden patches of ice.