What if my plan doesn’t work? What if he goes to prison and this was all for nothing? What if they didn’t so much as sniff in Travis’s direction, and this was all pointless? I no longer had the excuse that I had gotten married, before I was even legal to drink, because I was saving him. Did I need an excuse if I loved him? Why did anyone get married? For love? We had that in spades. I was so sure of everything in the beginning. I used to be sure about a lot things. I didn’t feel sure now. About anything.
I thought about the look on Travis’s face if he found out the truth, and then I thought about what bailing would do to him. I never wanted him to hurt and I needed him as if he were a part of me. Of those two things I was sure.
Two knocks on the door nearly sent me into a panic attack. I turned, gripping the top of the chair back. It was white wire, swirls and curves formed a heart in the middle.
“Miss?” Elvis said in a deep, southern voice. “It’s time.”
“Oh,” I said quietly. I don’t know why. He couldn’t hear me.
“Abby? Your hunka hunka burnin’ love is ready for ya.”
I rolled my eyes. “I just . . . need a minute.”
The other side of the door was quiet. “Everything okay?”
“Yes,” I said. “Just one minute, please.”
After a few more minutes, there was another knock on the door. “Abby?” It was Chantilly. “Can I come in, honey?”
“No. I’m sorry, but no. I’ll be okay. I just need a little more time, and I’ll be ready.”
After another five minutes, three knocks on the door caused beads of sweat to form along my hairline. These knocks were familiar. Stronger. More confident.
“Pidge?”
CHAPTER SEVEN
Cash
Travis
The door blew open. “She’s here! I just showed her to a dressing room to freshen up. Are you ready?”
“Yeah!” I said, jumping to my feet. I wiped my sweaty palms on my slacks and followed Chantilly out to the hallway, and into the lobby. I stopped.
“This way, honey,” Chantilly said, encouraging me toward the double doors that led into the chapel.
“Where is she?” I asked.
Chantilly pointed. “In there. As soon as she’s ready, we’ll get started. But, you have to be at the other end of the aisle, sugar.”
Her smile was sweet and patient. I imagined she dealt with all kinds of situations, from drunks to jitters. After one last look at the door to Abby’s room, I followed Chantilly down the aisle and she gave me the rundown on where to stand. While she was talking, a man with thick chops and an Elvis costume pushed open the door in grandiose fashion, curling his lips and humming “Blue Hawaii.”
“Man, I really like Vegas! You like Vegas?” he said, his Elvis impression spot-on.
I grinned. “Today I do.”
“Can’t ask for better than that! Has Ms. Chantilly told you everything you need to know to be a mister this mornin’?”
“Yeah. I think.”
He slapped my back. “No worries, fella, you’re gonna do just fine. I’ll go get your missus. Be back in a flash.”
Chantilly giggled. “Oh, that Elvis.” After a couple of minutes, Chantilly checked her watch, and then walked back down the aisle toward the double doors.
“This happens all the time,” the officiant assured me.
After another five minutes, Chantilly popped her head through the doors. “Travis? I think she’s a little . . . nervous. Do you want to try to talk to her?”
Fuck. “Yeah,” I said. The aisle seemed short before, but now it felt like a mile. I pushed through the doors, and raised my fist. I paused, took a breath, and then knocked a few times. “Pidge?”
After what felt like two eternities, Abby finally spoke, her voice on the other side of the door. “I’m here.” Even though she was only inches away, she sounded miles away, just like the morning after I brought those two girls home from the bar. Just the thought of that night made me feel a burning sickness in my gut. I didn’t even feel like the same person I was then.
“You okay, baby?” I asked.
“Yes. I just . . . I was rushed. I need a moment to breathe.”
She sounded anything but okay. I was determined to keep my head, to fight away the panic that used to cause me to do all kinds of stupid stuff. I needed to be the man Abby deserved. “You sure that’s all?”
She didn’t reply.
Chantilly cleared her throat and wrung her hands, clearly trying to think of something encouraging to say.
I needed to be on the other side of that door.
“Pidge . . .” I said, followed by a pause. What I would say next could change everything, but making everything all right for Abby trumped my own epically selfish needs. “I know you know I love you. What you may not know is that there is nothing I want more than to be your husband. But if you’re not ready, I’ll wait for you, Pigeon. I’m not going anywhere. I mean, yeah. I want this, but only if you do. I just . . . I need you to know that you can open this door and we can walk down the aisle, or we can get a taxi and go home. Either way, I love you.”
After another long pause, I knew it was time. I pulled an old, worn envelope from my inside jacket pocket, and held it with both hands. The faded pen looped around, and I followed the lines with my index finger. My mother had written the words To the future Mrs. Travis Maddox. My dad had given it to me when he thought things between Abby and me were getting serious. I’d only pulled this letter out once since then, wondering what she’d written inside, but never betraying the seal. Those words weren’t meant for me.