Taylor, Zeke, and Dalton all joined me on the floor. Zeke checked Don’s pulse and then looked at Taylor as he shook his head.
“Call an ambulance!” Taylor yelled to Phaedra. “Scoot back, sweetheart.” He positioned himself next to Don and crossed his hands, one over the other, on the center part of Don’s lower chest.
Dalton angled Don’s head upward and then pinched his nose, breathing into Don’s mouth once, before Taylor began compressions.
I crawled backward several feet until Kirby knelt beside me. Don’s glasses were next to my hand, so I snatched them up and held them to my chest, watching the guys working on him. Everyone was quiet, listening to Taylor counting compressions aloud and instructing Dalton when to administer breaths.
Zeke checked Don’s pulse, and each time he shook his head, I felt my body sink lower.
Taylor was out of breath, but he took one look at me, and whatever expression was on my face gave him renewed strength. “C’mon, Don!” Taylor said. “Breathe!” he barked to Dalton.
Dalton leaned over, giving a breath, all hope gone from his eyes.
“Taylor,” Zeke said, touching Taylor’s arm.
Taylor shrugged Zeke off, continuing to press into Don’s chest. “I’m not giving up.” He looked up at me. “I’m not giving up.”
Chuck picked me up off the floor and supported my weight as he held me to his side. “I’m sorry, kiddo.”
Just a few minutes after the sirens could be heard, they were loud and right outside the door, the lights casting reds and blues inside the Bucksaw.
Taylor, Dalton, and Zeke let the paramedics take over, one of them patting Taylor on the back. They loaded Don onto the gurney and carted him outside into the rain and then into the ambulance.
Taylor heaved, exhausted after using his entire upper body for so long.
“Is Don going to be okay?” Chuck asked.
Taylor pressed his lips together, hesitant to tell the truth. “I don’t know. We never got a pulse. I think he was gone before he hit the floor.”
I covered my mouth and turned to Chuck, letting his large arms surround me. I felt other hands on me, but I wasn’t sure whose. My knees buckled, and my entire body went limp, but Chuck supported my weight without effort.
“Chuck,” Phaedra said, desperation in her voice.
“Go on upstairs, honey,” Chuck said into my ear.
“I’ll take care of your tables,” Phaedra said.
I shook my head and wiped my nose with the back of my wrist, but I was unable to answer.
Taylor tossed his truck keys to Dalton. “You guys go ahead. I’ll take mine to go, Phaedra.”
“I’ll bring it up to you when it’s ready,” she said.
Taylor peeled me from Chuck’s arms and escorted me to the back and up the stairs. Just as he realized neither of us had keys, Phaedra appeared with a plate in one hand and a to-go cup along with my keys in the other.
“You’re amazing,” Taylor said as Phaedra unlocked the door.
She pushed it open, and Taylor guided me inside, sitting with me on the couch. Phaedra set his plate and cup on the coffee table and then left my keys.
“You want a blanket, kiddo?” she asked, leaning over and touching my knee.
The sirens blared as the ambulance tore off for the nearest hospital, taking away my friend.
“I should have gone with him,” I said, looking up in horror. “Someone should be with him. He’s all alone. He doesn’t know those paramedics. Someone he knows should be with him.”
Phaedra reached out for me. “Chuck is calling Michelle. She’s going to meet them at the hospital. Let me get you a blanket.”
I shook my head, but she went to the closet anyway. She fetched a threadbare baby-blue blanket, bordered in equally worn satin. She shook it until it unfolded, and then she covered me up to my neck.
“I’m going to bring you some tea. You need anything, Taylor?”
Taylor shook his head, wrapping his arms around me. “I got her.”
Phaedra patted his shoulder. “I know.”
She left us alone in the silence-filled loft that hovered over the death below. My head and chest felt heavy, my mouth dry.
“You knew he wasn’t coming back,” I said. “But you kept going. Even though he didn’t make it … you’re good at your job.”
He looked down on me, his eyes turning soft. “It wasn’t about the job, Falyn.”
“Thank you,” I whispered, trying to find anywhere else to look but his eyes.
“He came in a lot, didn’t he?” Taylor asked.
“Yes,” I said, my voice sounding far away.
The feeling inside of me was strange. I was so accustomed to feeling numb that feeling anything at all was unsettling. Nestled in Taylor’s arms, feeling a myriad of emotions was more than I could stand.
“I need to …” I began, shrugging from his embrace.
“Breathe?” Taylor asked. He touched my wrist, and then he leaned over to look into my eyes. Once he was convinced I wasn’t going into shock, he relaxed back against the sofa. “I’m really pretty comfortable. No expectations.”
I nodded, and he reached his arm around me, pulling me gently against his side. I fit perfectly under his wing, his chest warm against my cheek. He rested his jaw on my hair, content.
Comfortable in the silence, comfortable with each other, we just breathed, existing from one moment to the next. The rain tapped against the window, making oceans of the streets and drenching the islands of cars passing by.