We reached the black pickup his parents recently bought him. He had his eye on it since summer and apparently, Lyle and Amelia thought that the best time to get it for him was a week after we got back from Mexico.
Ben tossed me the keys. “You drive.”
I got in the driver’s seat and started the car. I was already backing up when Ben asked a long overdue question.
“Why did you come back with me? Why did you choose me over him?”
“Since when was the choice between you and Derek?”
I flinched when he hit the glove compartment in frustration. “Can you really be so dense, Sofia?”
First I’m naïve. Now I’m dense. Great. “I came back because it was the sensible thing to do. You have no idea what I went through in there, Ben. There wasn’t a day that passed by that I didn’t think of escaping. Heck… I even tried as soon as I got the chance.”
“You tried to escape?”
“Yes – I thought I already told you that. I got as far as the wall lining the island before two vampire guards caught me.”
“What happened?”
“They were going to kill me. One of them was already licking one of my scratches when Derek showed up.” I could sense Ben tense at the mention of Derek, but I decided to ignore him. This was my story to tell and it was he who opened up this can of worms. Suck it up, Ben. “He asked who had a taste of my blood. One guard admitted to it. Derek ripped the vampire’s heart out and let the other one go.”
“And you still don’t think he’s a murderer?”
“I’m not saying what he did was right, but he did what he thought was necessary to protect me. Once a vampire gets a taste of a human’s blood, they will crave that particular human. Derek knew that as long as I was around, the guard would have an urge to hunt me.”
“Then why didn’t he do the same thing to his brother? Lucas fed on you, didn’t he?”
“He was going to.” I recalled the look in both brothers’ eyes that night. I knew that Derek was more than willing to end Lucas’ life. I also knew that he would never be able to forgive himself for doing it. “I stopped him.”
“You what? Sofia, why? If I could be given the chance to end Claudia’s life, I wouldn’t hesitate to do it and I wouldn’t feel an ounce of guilt about it either.”
“Lucas is still Derek’s brother. That means something to Derek… Family means something to him.”
At that, Ben grew silent. He knew what family meant to me and why I would respect Derek for valuing family. I stopped at a red light and rubbed my neck with my palm, trying to ease my own tension.
“Derek… did he ever…” he hesitated.
“No. He never fed on me. He never had his way with me.” I was relieved when the red light went green again. The sooner we get home, the sooner this conversation is over. “And for the record, my choice to leave the Shade wasn’t about you or him. It was about me. I didn’t want to live my life as a slave – Derek’s or otherwise. That wasn’t a future I wanted for myself. I left the island because I knew that I could carve a better future for myself out here than back there.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know…”
“That’s because you never asked, Ben.”
For the rest of the ride home, both of us remained silent. When we reached the Hudsons’ driveway and I finished parking, we lingered inside the pickup, both of us hating the strain between us.
“I feel like I’m losing you, Sofia.”
I didn’t know what to say to that. It sparked the memories of all those times that I wanted him to want me, of times I daydreamed of being in his arms, of becoming his girl. Is it possible that he actually felt something for me all this time?
Consumed by the silence, I took hold of his hand and squeezed tightly. “I’m right here.” For now. I hoped it was enough to assure him that he hadn’t lost me yet.
Our fingers intertwined and then his lips were on mine. Gentle. Chaste. Sweet. Numb. I was too surprised to respond and the kiss came to a quick end. Our eyes met for a split second before we both fumbled out of the vehicle and made our way to the door.
Amelia’s mouth dropped open when she saw her son. “Ben… what happened?”
“It’s nothing, mom…”
Amelia looked at me questioningly, almost as if she were blaming me for the cuts and bruises he received. We entered the house and I let Ben explain to his mother what happened. He was in the middle of telling her that either she or Lyle had to go to school and speak to the guidance counselor with him tomorrow, when I decided to retire to my room. I wondered where Lyle and Abby were and remembered that she had a play date. Lyle probably went to pick her up.
I was exhausted – more in an emotional sense than a physical one. I collapsed on the bed. My phone began vibrating within my bag. I fished for it and found a text message from an unknown number. The message read: For the record, Ben was fighting for you. – Connor
I wondered if Ben put him up to sending the text. Either way, I was intrigued. Fighting for me? I found it confusing that Ben would suddenly – in a span of one day – show that kind of interest in me when he never looked at me as more than a friend for so long. Is he just doing this to get me to join him in his quest for revenge?
I opened my closet for a change of clothes. I’d just finished slipping on a red tank top and buttoning up my shorts when Ben knocked twice and opened my door.