Before my mom could respond, the mayor stepped up to the microphone, tapped it once to see if it was working, then launched into a speech about how in tragic times, it’s so important for a community to come together and blah, blah, blah. I shifted from foot to foot and looked around at the crowd, at all the people who loved Lizzie gathered in one place.
Part of me wished something terrible would happen. Like maybe there was a fault line running through the park, and there’d be an earthquake, and the ground would split open, and we’d all be swallowed. Or a flash flood would wash away everyone at the vigil. Then the world would pretty much be free of anyone who cared about Lizzie. It would be like she never existed.
Only she did exist. And she was probably out there somewhere watching the news coverage, laughing about how easily she’d tricked everyone. Then she’d go to a new town and start over. Make a whole new group of people love her. And maybe, if they were lucky, she’d deem a few of those people worthy enough to get her love in return.
Lizzie’s mom took the microphone next. She was a tired-looking woman in wrinkled clothes. A woman whose appearance had clearly stopped mattering to her since her daughter disappeared.
“I want to thank everyone for coming,” Ms. Lovett said. “I wish Elizabeth could see us gathered together like this.”
She paused and blinked back tears, trying to stay composed while she pleaded with the crowd to find her only child.
“I also want to thank everyone who’s been part of the search party and answering phones on the tip line we’ve set up. I know my daughter is out there, and I know we’ll bring her home.”
Another pause. Ms. Lovett pulled a tissue from her pocket and dabbed at her eyes.
“Father Patrick is going to lead us in a prayer, but first, I wanted to say a few words about Elizabeth.”
She reached into her pocket again and pulled out a piece of paper. She unfolded it and held it in a hand that shook as much as her voice.
“Those who know Elizabeth know how full of life she is. Even as a baby, she was always smiling.”
Ms. Lovett droned on and on about how great Lizzie is, as if everyone hadn’t heard it a million times already. Lizzie was the reason her squad had won the state cheerleading competition years ago. She was so friendly that she got Christmas cards from people she’d only met once. She was so selfless that she donated a third of every paycheck to some wildlife conservation society. Smart, pretty, talented, humble. Lizzie Lovett was perfect.
I stopped listening and started looking around.
That’s when I saw movement on the other side of the bandstand. People parted as someone pushed through the crowd. He climbed up the steps toward Lizzie’s mom. Shoulders slouched, hands shoved into the pockets of a wrinkled gray cardigan. His longish, dark hair hung in his eyes. Lorenzo Calvetti, late for his own girlfriend’s vigil.
Even from where I was, I could see the head of police frowning at him. Ms. Lovett paused and motioned Lorenzo to her, wrapping an arm around his skinny shoulders.
“Elizabeth’s absence has left a hole in many lives. She… I know my daughter. She didn’t run away. She’s out there in those woods, and she’s alone and scared. I just want her to come home safely. I need her to come home.”
Ms. Lovett broke down. Lorenzo shifted his weight, like he knew he was supposed to comfort her but didn’t know how. Mayor Thompson ended up being the one to do it. He stepped forward and whispered some things in Ms. Lovett’s ear and pulled her back from the microphone.
The police officer took over and talked about where the search parties would be meeting the next day and what people could do to help. Then the priest led the gathering in prayer. I watched the people on the bandstand. Ms. Lovett wiping her eyes. Lorenzo Calvetti running his hands through his hair. Lorenzo Calvetti looking down at his feet. Lorenzo Calvetti looking like he wanted to be anywhere else. Lizzie was missing, but Lorenzo was the one who seemed in need of rescue.
It wasn’t until people started waving their daisies in the air that I pulled my attention away from the bandstand. It seemed spontaneous but probably was planned, because somehow, everyone else knew that’s what the flowers were for. People held them above their heads and swayed back and forth. Father Patrick prayed, and hundreds of tiny white petals blew around in the breeze, making something beautiful out of something ugly.
I didn’t wave my daisy. I felt small, the way an ant must feel looking up at a field of wildflowers. I was nothing. I was trapped below the flowers, buried under them, while girls like Lizzie Lovett danced overhead. That was life. We all have a place.
I wondered where Lorenzo Calvetti belonged.
Chapter 6
Under the Light of the Moon
I pretty much expected my parents to drop the whole part-time job idea, but they didn’t. That’s why, on the Saturday after the vigil, I spent the day driving around, pretending to look for work.
Except at first, I wasn’t pretending. I went to the video rental place that had been on the verge of closing for, like, five years. They weren’t hiring. So I went to the trendy shoe store next door. It’s a place I’d always hated, not just because they call themselves a boutique, but also because all their shoes are ugly. I wanted to tell my parents I’d put in a lot of applications though, so I was about to fill out the paperwork when Mychelle Adler appeared from nowhere. She was all, “Oh my God, don’t tell me you’re actually applying to work here.” I put down the application and walked out.