My phone buzzes with a text message when we're driving back to the city.
"Can you read it to me?" I ask Nathan.
"It's Jessica. She wants to know why you want Wes's number."
"Text her back and tell her it's a surprise."
I hear Nathan typing away on my cell phone.
"She says you have enough guys in your life and need to take a breather."
I steer the car to the side of the road and grab my cell out of Nathan's hands.
"What are you doing?"
"Bribing my best friend." I smile when she finally texts me Wes's number. I dial it and wait for an answer.
"Wes, this is Amy. You know, the virgin from the youth group meeting."
"I remember. The girl with the dark hair and clear blue eyes. Are you breathing heavy on purpose?"
"No, that's just my dog panting in my ear."
"Yeah, right," he says, totally not believing me.
"Listen, if you ever need a guitar player for Lickity Split, my friend Nath--I mean Nate--Nate Greyson is his name and he rocks."
"I sing, too," Nathan whispers beside me.
"He sings, too," I add.
"We're rehearsing today at Lounge Ax. If he wants to come by and jam with us, that's cool. Can't say he's in the band, but we're always lookin' for subs."
I hang up and toss the phone into Nathan's lap.
"Thanks," he says. "I think I once called you inconsiderate and rude. You're not."
"Yeah, well, you caught me when I'm heartsick and weak."
I tell Nathan to be at Lounge Ax later. I have to pick up Jess and take her to dinner. The bribe dinner.
At Hanabi, our favorite sushi place, I order the Jewish Chef's Special without crab or shellfish, a spicy tuna roll and spicy tuna rice bowls with tempura crunch. Jess orders the Hwe Dup Bob bowl of kosher sushi, lettuce, and brown rice.
Jess takes the first bite of her special concoction and moans with delight. "This is so good."
"It better be. It's costing me sixteen dollars."
She shoves another forkful into her mouth. "First Avi, then Nathan... now Wes. I think you've gone off the deep end here. I have to say giving you Wes's cell number was so worth this dinner."
Frustrated, I tell Jessica the truth. "The number was for Nathan. He plays guitar and needed guys to jam with."
"So you just spent sixteen dollars on my dinner for doing something nice for Nathan?"
I shove a spicy tuna roll into my mouth and nod.
Jess puts her fork down. "So you're not into Wes?"
I shake my head. "Nope."
"What about Nathan?"
Another shake. "Nope."
"And Avi?"
At the mention of his name, my heart stings. "He's staying at Northwestern with a friend. It's over."
"Why?"
"Because he wants it to be. I kissed another guy, I humiliated him in front of everybody, and because he's in the Israeli military for the next three years."
"Do you still like him?"
"Oh, man, Jess, you can't imagine. It's like he took a piece of me when he left. I really screwed up. I wish I knew where he was, but even if I did I wouldn't know what to say to him."
"Too bad you can't kidnap him."
Yeah. Too bad. If I could kidnap him then I could tell him that it doesn't matter that we're apart. It doesn't matter that I kissed another guy. My heart still belongs to my Israeli soldier and nobody can take that away...not time or a kiss. But why can't I kidnap him? Why can't I make him listen to what he might not want to hear? While my mind is churning, I'm getting more excited by the second.
"That's it. Jess, you're a genius!" I say.
She looks at me, confused and clueless. "I think I missed something."
"No, you're right. I need to kidnap Avi. Secret military operation style--it's right up his alley."
"Jess, you don't even know what dorm he's staying in."
"We'll find out. Doesn't Miranda's aunt work in admissions? That's why she thinks she's automatically getting in?"
"Okay, so suppose you know where he's staying. Then what? We're going to handcuff him and take him in a getaway car? I've only seen him a few times, but I know he could overpower the two of us no problem."
She's right. I need more muscle on my side--a guy. "Nathan will help."
"Nathan?"
I convince her he's the only one who'll help. Besides, our kiss was fifty percent his fault.
In the evening, I recruit Nathan and Miranda. Nathan's skeptical, but Miranda's on board. We plan the mission for Friday, after school.
Two days from today.
25
***
What is God's definition of a family? I've been trying to figure out my own definition, but I can't come up with one that makes complete sense.
***
I'm going to be a grandmother. For real. My dad talked to Mr. Obermeyer's vet on the phone, confirming the results. Mutt really is a stud.
Not wanting bad blood with Mutt's father-in-law, I bake homemade doggie cookies and knock on Mr. Obermeyer's door. The creak on his floor alerts me he's home, although I'm not sure when he peeps through his peephole and realizes it's me he'll open the door.
Lucky (or not) for me, he opens the door. He does not look happy to see me. "What do you want now?"