If I didn’t have my father, brother and sister to fight for, I would’ve surrendered myself to the hunters, ending my life under their cruel hands. I couldn’t bear to do that to my family though, especially not to Vivienne. The coven needed me at that time, but when I fulfilled my part of the bargain and managed to bring them to this safe haven and win Cora over to our side as our protection, I knew I couldn’t bear living another second with all the blood that was on my hands. I had to end it.
But I was a coward. I dreaded to think of what would happen once I actually die. What happens to the living dead once they pass away? I shuddered every time I found myself thinking about it. It was perhaps quite a strange thing that the undead could be so afraid of death, and yet it was truth. I was afraid to die, so I went to sleep instead.
As we walked through the dense wood, I couldn’t help but speak my thoughts. “You must hate me for having done what I did…abandoning you all.”
I noticed how Lucas’ jaw twitched, a flicker of the familiar resentment showing in his eyes. I didn’t need to hear a response from him to know what was going through his mind. Of course he hated me.
Vivienne was far more gracious. “No, Derek. You did what had to be done to protect us all without even knowing it. Your rested state has caused you to gain energy over the hundreds of years that you were under Cora’s spell. Because of this, you’re most likely the strongest and most powerful vampire in existence today.”
Lucas asked a question about how exactly I managed to win Cora over to our side, but Vivienne’s words echoed through my head… strongest and most powerful vampire. Recollections of how I practically threw Sofia up that pillar roamed through my mind.
My gut clenched. She looked fragile under my grasp and yet so fearless. I was death and I was looking her right in the eye. She looked right back. Without even flinching. She was walking behind me. I could hear her gentle footsteps and the clanging of the shackles over her wrists. I could still smell and practically taste the blood on her lips. I wondered if this was the same effect women had on me before. I couldn’t even remember.
I stopped in my tracks and called to her. “Sofia.”
Everyone stopped our walk through the night the moment I spoke the words.
Her youth showed in the way she responded to me. “What?”
Without even looking back, I knew that she was about to suffer pain for her insolence in addressing me. I could practically see the guard behind us raising his hand to hit her.
“Don’t touch her,” I commanded. “Sofia, walk beside me.”
I held my breath at the momentary silence that followed. I could almost sense her thinking, weighing the pros and cons of what could happen should she dare defy me. I breathed a short sigh of relief when the shackles began clinking with her every step as she filled the empty spot on my side.
I didn’t dare look at her. Having her so close was already taking its toll on my self-control… I was certain that just the sight of the bright red blush on her cheeks would remind me of her blood and my longing to partake of it.
“Get rid of these restraints. She has nowhere to run to.”
“Brother…” Vivienne began to protest. “If she uses the freedom you’re giving her to raise a hand against you, you might not be able to control yourself from…”
“I won’t feed on her.” I said it with more conviction and self-assurance than I actually felt. “Do as I say and remove the chains.”
My command was heeded to immediately. It was yet another reminder of who I was before, of how much they all feared me. I waited until the restraints were removed before I took a first step forward, the group following my pace.
Lucas and Vivienne tried to make conversation as we trekked through the dark wood, but I was no longer paying attention. I was too distracted by Sofia, aware of every single one of her actions. She rubbed her wrists even as she observed her surroundings. She was taking in every detail of her surroundings, her eyes showing bright curiosity and mild fascination. Before I could keep myself from doing it, I grabbed her hand, my fingers intertwining with hers.
She flinched from my touch. I knew I had no right to take that sort of liberty with her, but I gave myself that indulgence, because I really just wanted to feel her warmth.
I could only guess what was going through her mind, because at some point, she squeezed my hand like she did to that other girl back in the Sanctuary. She couldn’t have known how much that meant the world to me.
CHAPTER 9: SOFIA
His hand was so cold. A chill climbed from the hand he was holding all the way up to my elbow. I couldn’t understand why he would do that – hold my hand. But the gesture strangely brought me comfort where I had none.
As we took the evening walk to wherever it was that would be considered the Prince’s quarters, I kept my eyes open for a means of escape. We’d just left the Vale and were now being ushered into another dark, murky wood, though I was sure that some other clearing would come to view, showing us another aspect of the Blood Shade that would astound my imagination.
At this point, however, there was nothing to be seen but trees and rocks and bushes. So, my thoughts roamed back to the people I saw back at the Vale. It was easy to tell the difference between the vampires and humans. Vampires wore a variety of outfits in what I was surprised to find were rather modern and stylish designs. The humans, however, all seemed to be wearing clothes made in similar fabric – what I assumed was coarse white cotton and gray wool. I noticed how all humans seemed busy with something. I was fairly certain that we humans were the workforce that was keeping the Blood Shade going. We were the Shade’s blood and sweat. Both literally and figuratively.