Katie moves to answer, but before she can, the Viking continues. “Were you abducted? Lured away by a stranger with candy? Or maybe you saw a cat in a tree and felt you had to save it? Was there an old queen trying to cross the street, and you had to help? No, wait—I know. You heard about a top-secret Sleater-Kinney concert in an abandoned BART station, but you weren’t allowed to tell anyone about it—not even your very best friend. That has to be it. Because if you are not bodily harmed, and if you were not at some secret show, or if you were not saving someone’s life, why would you leave here without saying a word and then not respond when I call you and text you a thousand times?”
“Lehna,” Katie attempts, “I just—”
Lehna holds up her hand, cuts off the excuse. “She was here, Katie. She was so excited to meet you. She brought you a flower, for Christ’s sake. And there we were, going from room to room, looking for you. We even checked the closets because isn’t that funny, ha ha ha, maybe she’s in the closet. She watched as I called and texted you. I said you had to be here somewhere. I said you wouldn’t just leave, because you were so excited to meet her. She believed me at first. But after a while, even I started to become unconvinced. Because you know what? You might as well have just slammed a door in her face. If you wanted to blow your chances this badly, why not just slam a door in her face?”
In the smallest, saddest voice I can imagine, Katie says, “She brought me a flower?”
I expect one of her other friends to pat her back, to tell her it’s going to be fine. When none of them does that, I find myself doing it instead.
She’s taking these deep breaths, like sobbing but without the tears. Like suddenly it’s all too much.
“She can’t have gotten far,” I say. Then I look at Lehna. “Where did she go?”
“Who the fuck are you?”
“I’m Mark. Why the fuck are you so angry?”
“I am angry because after months of planning, after concocting a brilliant cover story and spending more energy on this relationship than I have ever spent on any of my own relationships, my best friend decided to bail. Even though she swore she wouldn’t. Even though she made it look like she was going to go through with it for once in her life. My awesome cousin was willing to put up with Shelbie’s hideous house music and even more hideous beer in order to meet this girl I had told her so, so many good things about. I am angry because this didn’t have to happen, but then it happened anyway. I feel like a complete fool for thinking it could have been otherwise. And I feel like an even worse fool for getting Violet so excited and then having to tell her, Sorry, it isn’t going to work, after all. I’d ask if this makes sense to you, fratboy, but I couldn’t give a shit whether or not it makes sense to you.”
“Stop,” Katie says. “Just stop. It was my mistake. Not his.”
“So you at least admit it was a mistake?”
“Why does that matter, Lehna? Really, why?”
Katie doesn’t sound angry. Just tired. My hand remains on her back. She is leaning into it a little.
My phone vibrates again, still in my other hand.
“Sorry,” I say, looking at the screen.
My mother.
Tell me you are on your way to the station.
Katie gives me a curious glance.
“My alibi’s been shredded and my mom wants me on the next train home,” I explain.
“I’ll drive you,” she says.
“You’ll drive him?” Lehna huffs.
Got a ride back, I text. Then I check my messages. Still nothing from Ryan.
Katie steps away from my hand. Steps toward June and Uma.
“I’m sorry I left without telling you,” she says. “I wasn’t ready. I wanted it so much, and I wasn’t ready for that.”
June looks like she’s going to say something, but Uma squeezes her hand and gestures her head in Lehna’s direction.
“You’re never going to be ready,” Lehna says, her voice warming somewhat. “Don’t you see that? You have to forget about ready. If you don’t, you’re always going to run away.”
I almost feel like it’s Ryan here, lecturing me. Except that my problem has never been about running away. My problem has been about staying in the same place.
“Where did she go?” Katie asks Lehna. “Just tell me.”
Lehna shakes her head. “Not tonight. Not now. It’s too late.”
My phone starts to make itself known again. Once I see it’s not Ryan, I leave it alone.
“I came back to see her,” Katie says. “Don’t you see that? I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t ready to see her. I’m still scared, but I’m not too scared.”
Lehna offers a hand, and I think for a second that this is it, Katie’s won her over. But instead she says, “Let it go for tonight. Come in and have a drink. Shelbie’s been asking about you, and I think she’s still sober enough to register that you’ve returned. Plus, they have Tanqueray.”
Katie leaves Lehna’s hand hanging in the air.
“You’re not going to tell me where she is? You know, and you’re not going to tell me?”
Lehna pulls her hand back, wipes it against her skirt. “She moved on. She was disappointed, but she moved on. You should do the same. And we can see where we are tomorrow.”
I’m figuring if I didn’t see Katie at the club early on, odds are she wasn’t there for much time. So this Violet didn’t wait all that long before moving on, whatever that means.