Ren shifted forms and Sarah gasped, but Ren noted that her grip on the dagger didn’t waver.
“You . . . you can’t be here.” Sarah’s voice shook.
She’s afraid, but not of me. She’s worried she’s losing her mind.
“I can’t disagree with you there,” Ren said. “My being here is an impossible thing. But it’s where I find myself these days, despite my former beliefs about what’s possible and what isn’t.”
Sarah frowned at Ren. “You’re a Guardian.”
“I was a Guardian,” Ren answered. “But the Guardians are no more.”
Sarah’s jaw clenched and Ren smelled a new wave of grief pouring off her.
“I died here,” Ren said simply.
“You’re a ghost,” Sarah said, shaking her head again. She laughed, but it sounded like she was on the verge of tears. “Of course. I would want to see ghosts, wouldn’t I?”
“You’re not crazy,” Ren told her. At least not when it comes to me.
Sarah looked at him sharply. “Excuse me?”
“You don’t think I’m really here, so you’re afraid you’ve lost it,” Ren said with a shrug. “That’s understandable, but it doesn’t change the fact that I am here.”
When Sarah shifted her weight, clearly unconvinced, Ren said, “If your mind conjured up a ghost, wouldn’t it be Shay? He’s the one you want to see. You don’t even know who I am.”
“My son isn’t dead.” Sarah finally sheathed her dagger. “Why would he be a ghost?”
“Good point.” Ren nodded.
“But you died here.” Sarah regarded Ren differently now, examining him as if she could turn up clues about his appearance. “In this room?”
“No,” Ren replied. “In the library.”
“When?” Sarah asked.
“The same day you were freed from Bosque’s prison.” Ren sighed. “The last battle of the war.”
Sarah’s eyes narrowed. “Wait, I . . . I think I saw your body.”
“It would have been this body.” Ren shifted into his wolf form and Sarah took a moment before she nodded.
Ren shifted back. “I’m Renier Laroche.”
“You were the other alpha,” Sarah said quietly, then her voice sharpened. “You were supposed to be with them. With her. If you were there, he wouldn’t have a place. He would have stayed.”
Ren had to fight back a snarl. “That’s not how it works.”
“I don’t care how it works.” Sarah glared at him. “You’re the Guardian. You should have been the one who turned into a wolf and ran off into the mountains.”
“You don’t know how much I wish it would have been that way,” Ren murmured.
Sarah didn’t hear him. Still angry, she said, “So why are you here, Renier? Have you come with a message from beyond to tell me my son is at peace? Are you supposed to be some kind of wolf angel who brings me comfort?”
The image of a wolf with wings and a halo jumped into Ren’s mind and was so ridiculous that he actually burst into laughter.
Sarah stared at him, incredulous.
Collecting himself, Ren said, “I’m sorry. But . . . a wolf angel?”
“I just . . .” Sarah tried to sound indignant, but quickly deflated. “I suppose that would be unlikely.”
“Pretty much,” Ren said. “But I’m a wolf spirit, and I would have told you that’s unlikely too.”
“Why are you here?” Sarah asked.
“I do have a message for you.” Ren gritted his teeth. A message I don’t want to give.
Sarah watched him expectantly.
“It’s about Shay.” Ren saw Sarah’s face blanch, then light up, then pale once more.
He didn’t want to say anything else. He wanted to lie. To keep Sarah away from Logan and his machinations. But he couldn’t.
“I was sent to you by someone who wants to help you,” Ren said.
“Help me how?” Sarah twisted her fingers together.
“Help you get your son back.” Ren growled at the hateful words, and Sarah took a step back, frowning.
“So it’s really possible?” Sarah asked. Ren watched a flurry of emotions cross her face and he could see that, despite her outbursts and her clinging to Shay’s memory, she hadn’t ever believed he would return to her.
Ren struggled with his answer. “I don’t know. I’m only bringing the message.”
And there it was, exactly what Logan had said. Semantics. It wasn’t much, but it was all Ren had. He wouldn’t promise Sarah anything. He wouldn’t attest to the truth or falsehood of Logan’s message. He would simply deliver it.
Sarah sank onto the edge of the bed. “Who sent this message?”
“Logan Bane.”
Ren felt a spike of satisfaction when Sarah stiffened. “Bane? A Keeper?”
“The son of Efron Bane,” Ren answered. “The heir to the pack that now occupies Haldis Cavern.”
“His legacy was undone by the war.” Sarah nodded, then her brow furrowed. “But wait. That name . . . Logan . . . didn’t he help to bring the Harbinger down?”
“He did,” Ren told her. “He’s been having some regrets about it.”
He was surprised he could say that. Ren found himself smiling.
“But,” Sarah said slowly, “he must want something. Something from me?”
“Right now he just wants to meet you,” Ren replied. “To talk.”
“Can I trust him?” Sarah asked.
“Absolutely not,” Ren answered without missing a beat.
Nice. Apparently neither Logan nor Bosque could force him to lie about who they were. This was getting better and better.
“Then why should I meet him?” Sarah stood up, folding her arms across her chest.
“I can’t tell you what you should or shouldn’t do,” Ren said, wishing it were otherwise. “I’m only here to give you the message. And there’s one more thing.”
“What?” Sarah asked, dread creeping into her eyes.
“Logan needs a demonstration of your intent,” Ren answered. “To show him that you want to collaborate and that you’re not going to just hand him over to the other Searchers.”