Immediately, I’m on the defensive, “No!”
“Doesn’t appear that way to me girly. You’re all flustered and red in the face. Looks like you’re ready to huff and puff and blow my house down.”
“Ezra Colston! What are you talking about?”
“Go home, look in the mirror Julia. You’re smitten with Elliott Gray. Boy, that is hilarious. Never thought I’d see the day that Julia Jacobs was a smitten kitten! Kind of always pegged you for a panther myself but heck I’ve been wrong before.”
“I am not! I am not as you say a smitten kitten! I’m.....I’m....” Doing a fantastic job of defending myself?
“Alright Julia, whatever you say,” he says closing the door.
I heard him chuckling through it and marched myself back over to my parents’ home. I stop in the foyer and glance in the mirror. Darn. He’s right. I am a smitten kitten. Can makeup fix this?
Thursday proves rather difficult at school. Now that Sawyer is on to me he’s paying very close attention to everything I do.
Friday rolls around and to be perfectly honest, I was exhausted. Between avoiding Elliott, wanting to find Elliott, wanting Elliott to find me, avoiding Sawyer, listening to Ezra taunt me about how Elliott and I are sitting in a supposed tree, school, homework, and parents I’ve had enough. I’m glad to have the week over with and plan a visit to Koan’s, my favorite indie book store in Charleston. I want to load up on books and camp in my room until school starts back up the following Monday; a little mini-vacay from my impossible life. No more Elliott. No more obsessing.
Koan’s is amazing. Only the hippest cats in town know about it. Okay, that’s sort of a stupid thing to say about a bookstore but let’s just say it’s off the beaten path. I head in and inhale the sharp smells of fresh ink. The earthy smell of paper permeates the air around me and I close my eyes for just a moment enjoying the temporary escape. I greedily finger the display piles and run my palms over the covers. If I were wealthy, I’d swim in a pile of books. I wouldn’t even mind the paper cuts. Nothing like them in the entire world, books that is, not paper cuts. They truly are like nothing in the entire world; that’s not necessarily true but you get what I mean.
I’m surrounded by university students and a few professor-types. Chuck, the cashier waves at me. His name isn’t really Chuck. I just call him that because he’s got these kick-butt bright red Converse he always wears.
“What’s new Chuck?”
“Not much, got the new Stefanie Conrad in. I saved you a copy.”
“Chuck, you know the way to this girl’s heart,” I said, feigning a light head.
“Snoop around. I’ll get it for you when I get rid of this line.”
I wink. It’s gonna’ be a good day. I hum a little ditty under my breath and scan the titles of each aisle while I wait for Chuck. I wonder into the self-help section and almost trip over myself. I absently trail my fingers along the titles, praying there would be one that read ‘You’re insane Julia Jacobs. Stop obsessing about Elliott Gray’ or ‘He’s just a normal boy dummy, a surprisingly kind and sweet boy who just happens to share literal electricity with you but that’s nothing to get so worked up about’. There wasn’t, but there was one ironically titled ‘Getting over the one you’re obsessed with’. I laugh out loud and get a few shushes. I almost pick it up but meander over to the Fantasy section instead. I pick up a random book and start reading the first chapter.
My head picks up when I hear the jingle of the door. Someone just left. My heart tingles slightly but I shrug it off. I take the book I’m reading over to the checkout line when Chuck waves me over with Stefanie’s new book in hand. I stand there waiting for my turn when I hear the door jingle again. I look up and suck in a breath. Elliott. My eyes widen then narrow, trying to figure out if he’s been near me that entire time, if he was the reason my chest ached. My heart tingles yet again. I lock eyes with him.
Elliott trips over a chair. His face and neck turn a brilliant red and I feel so sorry for him. The girl in front of me laughs. That infuriates me. I fight the urge to pull her hair. Violent. Why so violent? That’s not like me. He yanks his coat from a chair and storms toward the door without so much as a second glance. My heart aches for him, cries for him.
“Be right back Chuck,” I say, and toss my book onto the counter.
I chase after him but I’m too late. He’s gone. Probably a good thing, I remind myself. I need to get over this obsession. He may be the sweetest boy I’ve ever met but that doesn’t mean he’s not going to break my heart. I return to the store and make my purchases.
Saturday proves to be harder to sit through than I thought. The books are just not doing it for me, not distracting me the way I wanted them to. I sit up, resign myself to doing something outside. I promise myself that I am not getting out to search for Elliott today but even I know that’s a lie. I push my books from my lap and onto the bed and head to my dad's study.
“Pop? Want to walk into town with me?”
“I would schnitzel but I’m swamped.” Schnitzel is a nickname he gave me at two.
“No prob Bob. I’m gonna’ go to Sadie’s shop then. Take a look around. See if there’s anything good on the shelves today.”
“You know your mother hates it when you shop at the thrift store.”
“Yeah, but it’s the only place I can find pre-loved jeans the way I like them loved.”