Beth's laugh has a clearly taunting note.
“Edward, really, a vibrating, remote controlled butt plug and a corset?
You're a hopeless sap, you know that?”
That doesn't deserve an answer, so I try to ignore her nasty grin.
“And a romantic weekend getaway in the mountains, honey moon cabin package.”
Of course the official part of my present fuels her amusement further.
“Cabin, getaway, and mountains means a hut in the woods where no one can hear her scream, right?”
My snort confirms my ulterior motives.
“I asked Bella's mom what she thought of that, and I'm now officially accepted as perfect son-in-law material. I have no idea how you always come up with such abstruse scenarios!”
“Because that's what I would think of first, and in this aspect we're very much alike, you and me.”
We share a smile before she goes on.
“So what about do you need my help? Sounds like you have everything planned already.”
“More or less,” I nod. “I already have everything except the corset.” Beth frowns at me for a moment. “You know that you need her measurements for that? Not like the slapstick comedy grope move where the lusty husband walks into the lingerie shop and shamelessly asks the shop assistant to model half of their matching sets because he can't decide what to buy his frigid wife who'll never wear it anyway? Although, if you'd walk into Victoria's Secret, the skanks would likely fall over themselves to offer you a cat walk show.”
I make a face, and Beth laughs loud enough that Raven sticks her head in to see what is so funny.
“I really don't know why you constantly have to shove my face in the fact that for whatever reason, women want to throw themselves at me. I don't even do anything to make them think I'd want them! Even before I had Bella I've never been interested.”
Which made bar hopping with Jazz a real pain in the ass, always. You'd think that seeing me reject ten skanks in a row would make the eleventh look for a different target, but no. And I really don't want to think about that at the moment. Or ever.
Beth saves me from having to bash my head against the table by redirecting our conversation.
“So, corset. Not quite your field of expertise.”
I shake my head, laughing.
“I just know how to get her in and out of one. But I know that you have a thing for anything tight and restricting, so I'm coming here begging for your help.”
“Begging, huh?”
“You know what I mean.”
The mirth in her look tells me she knows exactly what I'm talking about, which is more than I'd admit right now. If she'd let me, I wouldn't let Bella leave the bedroom without wearing a corset ever again. At least for anything involving sex.
“What do you have in mind? I vaguely remember that you were taunting her with having her wear it underneath her clothes at the birthday party with her parents.”
I nod, but I know that's a bad idea. I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off her, and as much as Charlie tolerates Bella's choice to be with me, I don't think it's wise to take PDA to that level in front of him.
“Actually, I'm planning on getting her two. I mean I can't very well send her over to you for measuring and expect her not to know why you need those details, but I don't think she'd expect me to shamelessly abuse the situation like that.”
Beth chuckles, although I'm not sure if she approves of my plan. “Okay, two. The question remains the same, what do you have in mind?”
“For her birthday present I thought about some less restricting, shorter one, you know like the satin underbust corsets that also made it into the H&M
racks?”
“You mean the fake, 'I'm so hip because I wear a corset' ones?” I grin at her disapproving tone.
“Exactly, only a real one. Just short. Maybe one that she can wear to work, too, over a blouse. Nothing that restricts her too much, but still keeps her in the right mind frame.”
“Mind frame, huh? You know, many women just like wearing corsets because they make them feel more feminine, or because they like the added support.”
“Oh, sure, like you never think of anything remotely sexual when you let Gerard help you tighten the laces?”
For a moment she sends me that look that means that she'd dearly like to spank me for that remark.
“I think it would be a disservice to him if it wouldn't turn me on when my slave touches me.”
“And what makes you think that Bella's any different when I help her with her corset and send her off to work with a whispered promise to have her ride me hard before I help her back out of it again?” Beth smiles, pacified again.
“Touché.”
“And I won't make her wear the corset if she doesn't like it. But I know she's been looking at some online, so I don't think that will happen.”
“She showed you?”
I shake my head, and steel myself for the tongue lashing that will inevitably follow now.”
“No, it came up in her browser history.”
Beth's glare is deadly.
“Tell me you did not go through her computer.” Sighing, I shake my head.
“I was just checking my emails, too lazy to get my own laptop, while Bella was upstairs getting ready for work. I only peeked at the last visited links in the URll bar.”
“Accidentally violating her privacy, wow, one of these days I'll actually believe you when you tell me something 'just happened'.” Her scorn grates but I can't really say anything to defend myself. We both know she's not referring to Bella's visited links, or some minor slip in the playroom.