“It can wear you out the first time,” Rafe said quietly, pressing a kiss against my temple.
“Only the first time?”
“It gets easier.”
With my first transformation, I had finished healing. The gash on my leg and the hole in my shoulder were both gone, having left behind only minimal scars. The wounds Rafe had received tonight, the result of a Shifter bite, were slower to heal but weren’t life threatening; they’d leave scars, but then, I had a couple as well. And I have to admit it: I thought his scars were sexy because they were a testament to what he had been willing to give up for me.
He led me toward the cavern behind the waterfall. Once inside, he released his hold on me, tossed his shirt and shoes to the side, and began preparing a place for us to sleep. I sank down onto the ground and drew my legs up beneath me. I watched as he worked, arranging only one pallet. Tonight there was no question that we would sleep together. For the first time it would be without guilt, without feeling as though I were betraying Connor.
I’d made my choice—and by leaving, he’d accepted it.
I thought about putting on my clothes, but my skin was still incredibly sensitive. I remembered how my mother always wore silk; perhaps this increased sensitivity was a side effect.
I shoved myself to my feet. “Let me help.”
Crouching beside the mound of blankets and pillows, he looked up at me. I thought I’d never grow tired of gazing into his warm, brown eyes, seeing the tenderness there that he felt for me. “No. This is part of the ritual.”
Suddenly I was a little nervous. Girls always talked about the transformation and being with their mates, but they never really talked about what came after. I knelt opposite him. “Really?”
“Yeah. Back in the old days this would be the first night that a couple would sleep together.”
“How do you know that?”
“Mating 101.”
I laughed, and some of the tension eased.
“Hey, I’m not kidding,” he said, his voice serious, his smile warm. “The elders make us sit through a lecture on how we’re supposed to treat our mates.”
I dropped my head back and groaned. “Brittany is so right. We’re totally archaic.”
My stomach tightened as I thought about her. I shifted my attention to the waterfall.
“She’ll be all right,” Rafe said.
I wasn’t so sure. “If I’d made the right choice earlier, Connor might have been with her.” Had my indecision killed her?
“No, he wouldn’t have. And knowing Brittany, she wouldn’t have taken a castoff.”
“I think she would have taken him. She…well, I think she loves him. Or at least she thinks she does. I mean, how can you ever really know until you’ve spent time alone with a person?”
“Then maybe they’ll hook up after tonight.”
If she survived…
She had to. She had to be okay.
Sitting on the blankets, Rafe moved closer to me and skimmed his fingers along my cheek. “She’ll be okay. She’s been preparing for tonight—working out, eating right. She’s in great shape. She’ll handle the change just fine.”
He was right. I had to believe that. I didn’t want anything to ruin our first night together as mates. I shoved all thoughts of Bio-Chrome and Brittany and the outside world to the farthest corners of my mind. Tonight was mine—mine and Rafe’s.
He swept in for a kiss, and I stopped him with a hand to his shoulder. “You can read my mind,” I said. “When you’re not in wolf form.”
“Yes. True mates are always in tune, regardless of the form they’re in. Concentrate and you’ll know what I’m thinking.”
It was a little difficult to concentrate on his mind when his mouth was doing such wicked things with mine. He was kissing me more deeply than he ever had. It was as though he wanted to brand me as his—but the full moon had already accomplished that. It had forced me to choose, and I’d chosen him.
We tumbled onto the mound of blankets. With so many of them piled up, they were more comfortable than I’d expected. Rafe held me close, our arms and legs intertwined. The robe I’d been wearing became nothing more than a blanket to cover us. Skimming my fingers over his bare chest and shoulders, I wondered if his skin was as sensitive as mine.
“Yes,” he murmured before he came in for another kiss.
Once again I tried to focus on his thoughts rather than on the kiss.
Silky…warm…mine…forever…
He was lost in the awe of it all, the wonder of us. I let my thoughts go, let everything go until there was nothing except us.
I felt much stronger the next day when Rafe and I packed up and began our journey back to Wolford. He was certain the Dark Guardians would be gathering there. Lucas had sent out word. We needed to begin preparing for our battle with Bio-Chrome.
We traveled slowly, taking our time. We wanted to remain in this blissful state as long as possible, because we knew hell would soon be nipping at our heels as we faced Mason and his father. I knew my parents would be at Wolford, waiting to officially welcome Connor into the family.
Surprise! I finally listened to my heart and not yours.
My parents were probably not going to be pleased with my choice, but something had happened as a result of my transformation—or maybe it had happened before, when I’d finally found the courage to make my choice. I felt as though I’d come into my own. I loved my parents and wanted to make them proud of me—but no longer at the cost of my own happiness. If they didn’t accept Rafe as my mate, well, then they’d lose me.
It was the pull of destiny, the call of wild beast to wild beast, but I knew I belonged with him.
Near twilight a couple of days later, we arrived at Wolford. We went through the front door into the foyer of the mansion. I tensed as my mom and dad emerged from a hallway.
“Hey, Mom. Dad. You know Rafe.”
My mom did the weirdest thing. She smiled and hugged Rafe as though he were a long-lost relative. When she stepped back, Dad shook his hand.
“Connor explained…,” Mom faltered.
Dad finished. “He said…well, he confessed that he didn’t truly love Lindsey in that way. Inconceivable! All these years it seemed as though he adored you. Sometimes you just never know about a person.”
Sometimes you don’t even know about yourself.