Allie, who had spent weeks in the infirmary recovering from the attack that resulted in Jo’s death, climbed the stairs with heavy feet.
When she arrived, the nurse seemed unsurprised to see her.
‘I guess it’s about time we had you back in,’ she said with dry humour. ‘What have you done to yourself now?’
When Allie told her about the panic attack, she tutted sympathetically before listening to her heart, taking her pulse and generally poking her around.
‘Well, you’re in better shape than the last time I saw you,’ she said finally. ‘Your heart sounds strong. But if it happens again I want you to come right back here. Agreed? There are things you can take – medications that can help.’
Allie grimaced. Her parents had put her on medication after Christopher left. She knew how brain pills, as she called them, worked. She was convinced they slowed her down. Make her feel weird. Like she wasn’t … her.
Everyone had told her it wasn’t true but she knew her own body.
Besides, she told herself, she didn’t need them. She’d had her last panic attack. And that’s all there was to it.
Mumbling a non-committal reply, she fled down the stairs with the panicked zeal of an escaped prisoner. She was half running along the ground-floor corridor when she saw Rachel heading towards her at an equally fast pace.
‘Hey.’ Rachel stopped her, a worried frown line dividing her eyes. ‘I heard you had a thing. Are you OK?’
‘Totally fine,’ Allie said breezily. ‘Nurse says I’m not sick. I’m just a freak.’
‘Well, she is a medical professional,’ Rachel joked, but Allie could see the concern in her cinnamon-coloured eyes. ‘You haven’t had one of those in while, have you? What set it off?’
Allie made a vague gesture. ‘It was just seeing Zelazny again. Knowing he might be …’
‘Yeah. I get it.’ Rachel patted her shoulder. ‘I’m glad you’re OK.’
Glancing down, Allie noticed Rachel wasn’t wearing her required school shoes. Instead she wore a pair of blue-and-white sandals she’d favoured when they were in France.
‘What’s with the naked toes?’ At Cimmeria, only prefects got to wear their own shoes. Jules had been prefect until her parents sided with Nathaniel and pulled her out of the school.
Her eyes widened. ‘Oh my God. Jules is gone. There has to be a new prefect. It’s you, isn’t it?’
‘There can be only one,’ Rachel intoned, trying and failing to suppress a pleased smile. ‘Anyway, yes. Meet the new boss. Isabelle just told me.’
‘Congratulations! That’s massive!’ Allie hugged her. ‘Are you going to give me marks?’
‘Effective immediately. Detentions all round.’ Rachel’s tone might have been mild but Allie could see she was flushed with happiness. ‘Oh, and there’s something else I need to tell you about but I’ll tell you tonight. I’m saving it up. A surprise.’
‘This is so great,’ Allie said, feeling cheerier. ‘Yes, our teachers might be trying to kill us. But you’re prefect now and you have other fun secrets. It’s like things are finally getting back to normal around here.’
Rachel laughed as they headed back out into the corridor, arm in arm. ‘Your normal terrifies me.’
Allie shot her a wry smile. ‘My normal terrifies everyone.’
Eleven
After dinner that night, Allie went straight from the mostly empty dining hall to the strangely quiet common room with Zoe, her book bag heavy on her shoulder.
‘I have so much work,’ she groaned, dropping the bag with a thud. ‘Don’t teachers know we have lives?’
‘School is my life,’ Zoe said, opening her notebook.
‘How awesome for you,’ Allie said darkly.
She settled on to the deep leather sofa and pulled out her books, looking through her assignments with increasing alarm. All the teachers had given out work but the worst was history. When she and Sylvain finally returned to Zelazny’s class, they’d found him giving everyone a huge essay to write.
‘We are looking,’ he’d said, his voice jumping a little as he wrote on the board, ‘at the age of Empire. Particularly, the structure of government and the ramifications for all citizens …’
He’d droned on for ages.
Now she had a week to write three thousand words on something she knew nothing about.
Muttering to herself, she flipped through her text book, but it was soon obvious it contained far too little information.
‘Bugger it.’ She sighed, standing up. ‘I’ve got to go to the library.’
‘I love the library,’ Zoe said without looking up.
Allie couldn’t take much more of her earnestness. She headed for the door, leaving her bag behind. ‘I’m off. If I’m not back in an hour, send a search party.’
‘How could you get lost in the library?’ Zoe looked baffled.
Allie held up her hands in surrender. Zoe didn’t get irony in the best of circumstances – she should have known better.
‘It’s just a stupid thing people say.’
‘People shouldn’t say stupid things,’ Zoe grumbled.
Relieved to leave the conversation behind, Allie stepped out into the hushed main hallway. Her footsteps echoed around her so loudly it sounded as if she was being followed. By the time she reached the library she was getting jumpy.